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第五百九十二章 徐阶的教诲

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“嗯,你们好,忙去吧,不用管我。”朱平安向两人点了点头,进了听雨轩。

“呀,土包子姐夫来了”

“嘘,小点声,还有不许叫我姐夫土包子”

朱平安走进听雨轩,就听到听雨轩卧室内传来一阵熊孩子和妞妞的声音,不由笑着摇了摇头,走了进去。

果然,才进去就看到了熊孩子,嘴里还塞着自己从家里带回来的吃食,小嘴油乎乎的,小胖手上还抓着熏兔腿的骨头。

兔腿骨头上没有一点肉丝,明显肉都被熊孩子啃进了嘴里。

见朱平安走进来,熊孩子一边努力的把嘴里的兔子肉使劲咽下去,一边的小胖手还把兔腿骨头往后藏,结果嘴里的肉太多了,虽然努力的咽下去了,但是差点把他自己噎个半死,白眼都翻出来了

桌上还有一罐打开的腌黄瓜明显被熊孩子吃了不少

朱平安见状哭笑不得,这个熊孩子吃这么多,也不怕撑着,腌黄瓜多咸啊,也不知道喝点水。

“好吃吗过来喝点水。”

朱平安笑着问了一句,走到桌前,动手往茶壶里加了些热水,给熊孩子倒了一杯茶,招呼熊孩子过来喝水。

“嗝我才不要,谁知道你有没有在茶水里下毒。”熊孩子对朱平安进门时的嘲笑眼神,怀恨于心,鼓着腮帮子,胖爪子抱在胸前,脚丫子一下一下的点着地,一副拽拽的欠揍样子。

“茶水里没下毒”朱平安拉长了尾音,然后恶趣味的勾了勾唇角,压低了声音,夸张的喑哑道,“不过兔子肉里倒是下了一瓶含笑半步癫。”

“哦,你可能还不知道什么是含笑半步癫,这是江湖上流传的天下第一奇毒,用蜂蜜,川贝,桔梗,加上天山雪莲配制而成,不需冷藏,也没有防腐剂,除了毒性猛烈之外,尤其是配上熏兔肉,味道还很好吃”

“但是,吃进肚子后,绝对不能笑或者走半步,否则会血脉逆流、走火入魔,全身爆炸”

朱平安压低声音,比了个爆炸的手势,吐了一个爆破音

“啊”

熊孩子信以为真的脸色大变,伸出胖爪子摸着喉咙,可着劲呕吐了起来,想把刚刚吃进肚子里的兔子肉吐出来,可是早就吃到肚子里了,干伸着舌头,毛都吐不出来。

“哈哈哈”朱平安见状不由得哈哈笑了起来,这熊孩子傻得真是可爱。

“你哼”熊孩子这才知道上当了,跟只肥蛤蟆一样气鼓鼓的瞪了朱平安好几眼。

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