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第101章 咋就进不去

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“是啊,其实就是去补交罚款,向人低头一一我都打听好了,一共需要三万块一一这些年,我攒了一万多,黄豆豆自己有一万多,这才两万多,还差一万,就能给他买回户口了……”

李雨夏把自己的计划和盘托出给娘看。更多小说ltxsba.“你说的靠谱吗?”戴一兰超生过两个孩子,也被罚过款,但可能由于当时李庆魁给人的印象是个谁都不敢惹的臭流氓,所以,也就没太难为他一一反正家里也都家徒四壁了,拿不出什么钱来,也就象征性地罚了儿款,给孩子都上了户口。可是像黄豆豆这样野地里捡回来的孩子,想上户口有多难,戴一兰也说不清楚。

“我和黄豆豆都打听过了,交钱就能上户口一一就上到豆腐坊老板娘家的户口本上。”李雨夏好像挺有把握的样子。“你可弄准了,三万块钱不是个小数目!”戴一兰一想,这个二丫头自己找到了如意郎君,就差个户口了,要是能帮助他把户口给上上了,让他们俩结成婚的话,也算是一桩喜事儿了。

也就在家里十分吃紧的情况下,拿出了一万块给了李雨夏。只是给她的时候,千叮泞万嘱咐,让她一定弄准成了再付钱。可是李雨夏和黄豆豆,充满希望地把钱交给了一个自称能给黄豆豆买来户口的家伙,苦苦等了一两个月都没消息,就来找那个人,却像人间蒸发了一样,不见了人影!这下李雨夏和黄豆豆都傻眼了,不但他们俩在豆腐坊用血汗攒下的两万多块打了水漂,还拐带了娘的一万块一一李雨夏瞒了娘一个多月,最后还是跪地求娘原谅她。

“你呀,啥时候办事儿能靠谱呢!”戴一兰一声叹息,也没太埋怨李雨夏。本来失去了钱财,遭受了打击,也不至于令李雨夏这样性格的姑娘寻死觅活,导致她不想活的,却另有原因……原谅,被骗子骗得一无所有之后,李雨夏一气之下,就对黄豆豆说:“去他娘的户口吧,咱俩不用登记就结婚,也不用举行婚礼一一

咱俩好,就什么都有了!”黄豆豆也被李雨夏的话给感动了,柔弱的性格,导致他对李雨夏的强悍言听计从。俩人把身上仅有的几百块钱划拉划拉,就在豆腐坊简陋的仓库里,布置了一个超级简单的洞房,就自行行礼拜堂,上了一张用豆腐板搭成的婚床,,然而,不上床还好,一上床,却曝出了一个惊天的秘密!

啥秘密?难道是黄豆豆性格儒弱,上了床,羊尾不举,不能行事?错,尽管黄豆豆性格弱,身体也不十分强壮,可是下边的棒糙倒是比较粗大,也说硬就硬。以往跟李雨夏在一起这十年中,没少在李雨夏的手里嘴里边,表现出色一一尤其是后来掠夺式开采那些高级护肤品的时候,就更显示出了黄豆豆这方面的优越能力。

只是碍于李雨夏的绝对优势,才一直没能上过李雨夏的身一一现在终于机会来了,管他登没登记,管他算不算结婚,反正李雨夏已经仰躺在这里,叉开两条大腿,就等着自己抄起棒糙捅破他们之间的那层窗户纸,从此就成了事实夫妻呢……

然而,一件令大家都想不到的事情,瞬间发生了!到底是咋回事儿呀!不是废话,也不是赘言,因为的确有些不可思议—李雨夏仰躺下去,终于向这个自己选中并且苦恋十来年的黄豆豆敞开了自己,也看见他满心欢喜,兴致勃勃地扑了上来,可是,咋冲了半天,就是进不去呢!“你咋找不到入口呢?”李雨夏还带着埋怨的口吻。“一共就这地方,我咋找不到呢!”黄豆豆也不可思议。

“找到了咋进不去呢?”“我奶的劲儿都使出来了,可就是进不去呀!”黄豆豆满头大汗地说。“你是不是进错地方了呀!”“不是啊,除了后边的粪坑,就该是前边的水坑了呀!”黄豆豆还真会比喻。“那你咋就进不去呢!”李雨夏也急出了满头大汗。“让我蜡烛照照看吧……”黄豆豆不知道提过多少次请求,想在过去的十年中,看看李雨夏的巴子长得什么样。可是,她就是不肯,从来都说,等到咱们的新婚之夜,再给你看、给你用一一

所以,黄豆豆拿过蜡烛,往李雨夏的私处一照,就有些不明真相一一因为的头回见到嘛,女人到底长啥样,从来都没见过,也就分辨不出李雨夏长成这样对不对。“看清楚了没有啊!”李雨夏急于知道答案。“看清楚了……”“找到入口了吗?”

“没找到!”“不可能啊,没有入口,我的尿是从哪里撒出来的?没有出口,我的月经是从哪里流出来的?”李雨夏立马起身夺过蜡烛,并且让黄豆豆找来一个小圆镜子,放在李雨夏的档下,她自己要照照看看一一

咦,奇怪了,真的没有入口和出口啊,就一个小米粒儿大小的小孔,好像真的不能让黄豆豆那么大个东西进入啊!“我这是咋了呢?”李雨夏连自己都不知道是咋回事儿。“你应该就是传说中的石女吧!”黄豆豆倒是突然冒出这么一句石破天惊的话来!

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