14.琳琅的回忆 下
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琳琅抬腿踢了那莫名男子一脚就立马扯下掩着眼睛的纱布，没命地奔跑起来。龙腾小说ltxsba.可惜这被娇养的身子，刚刚欲动完，随着越加疾速的步伐，也开始抗议这项剧烈运动。
匆匆忙忙压抑着疲惫跑出园林，回头看看来路，见没人追来，微微放下心。试着平复自己的心跳，赶忙整理好自己的衣衫，可惜亵裤却被那混蛋扯烂了，那细碎的布料也留在了树林里，好在有重重裙摆掩盖着空荡荡的胯下。
那男子是自己的一个哥哥吧？能自由出入皇宫的男人仅有当朝的七位皇子啊，只是不知道是哪位哥哥。而那位树木掩盖下的绝美男子，自己的四哥，却在奸yín着父皇的妃子，虽然现在等于虚设的后宫，但这其中的yīn谋自己该告诉父皇好？还是隐瞒着？
不想见到父子相对的场面，从小时就渴望着亲情，渴望父义，母慈，兄友弟恭，就如自己的上一世一般。所以不想任何一位哥哥与父皇发生争执，最后如小时母亲那般被父皇折磨致死。是的，琳琅清楚地知道自己的母亲是活活被父亲折磨死的。
琳琅记得刚出生时，母亲听到嬷嬷禀告自己是位小公主后，表情瞬时变得淡漠，甚至连看也没看就让嬷嬷给抱下去了。
至两岁期间，每次得到母亲的关爱及亲吻时，都是在父皇到母亲宫殿留宿的时候。自己能清楚地看到母亲抱着自己时，亲吻自己的额头时，眼睛中的恶毒与厌恶，但这样自己已经满足了。这是自己这世最亲近的人啊。
只是第一次见到父皇的时候，根本无法相信自己的眼睛，那云淡风轻，似乎万物在其眼中皆淡如灰尘的傲世之眸，让自己不禁忘记了孩童的伪装，睁着自己那双黑溜溜的眼珠子傻愣愣地望着他。可他淡淡瞥了自己一眼便转移了视线，搂着母亲转向别间。终于了解到母亲也许太爱父皇了，没能为他生个儿子的怨恨转移到自己身上来了。
自己在那一次就已陷入了对其举世无双的淡漠吸引，无数次地接近他，怯生生地喊着：“父皇”。后来父皇也会抱着自己，却无任何父女间的亲密，而母亲却在父皇对自己的淡漠中，越加地厌恶自己，甚至在无人之时，狠狠地掐着自己的布料掩盖下的身体各处，大喊、哭叫也无法唤回母亲的怜悯。但这样仍然浇灭不了我对母亲的那份热爱。
两岁时，母亲因外公兵败，情绪失控地掐着自己的脖子，吼道：“你个狐狸精，都是你，若不是你，宸不会这麽快打乱部署已久的计划，父亲不会这麽快倒台，我也能继续在宸身边，为什麽你不去死，你去死！”。我闭上眼睛，准备结束这短暂的生命，以偿还给母亲。
可房门“！”地一声，下一刻传来母亲的疼痛声，我睁开眼睛，是他！那无与伦比的神貌中已不是往日的淡漠，那眼眸中蓄满的是深深的恐惧：“琳琅……”。
那是父皇第一次喊我，但缺氧的脑袋却无法回应，只能渐渐闭上眼睛。
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