第十九章 癞蛤蟆想吃天鹅肉
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在切猪肉的时侯，他好像注意到猪肉中间有一个圆洞，好像还挺深的，他也没有在意。
李保山正在睡的香的时侯，被人推醒了，睁眼一看，是二哥李二狗。李保山并不羞愧，也不惊慌，懒洋洋的翻了个身子，打着呵欠说：“哟，二哥下地回来啦？吃饭了吗，要是没吃，我锅里还有饭哪？”
这时李保山的老婆嘴快，连忙抢着说：“哪里还有什么饭，都让我和儿子吃光了。”
李二狗的脸色很不对劲，用一种奇怪的眼神，望着保朝，说：“保朝，你见我那块猪肉了吗？”
李保山装做吃惊的说：“没呀，怎么了？猪肉少（丢）了？你怎么舍得买猪肉呀，你这么会过（小气）？”
李二狗的脸色变得有难看起来，望着李保山仍然油腻的嘴唇，又望着旁边的弟媳妇和侄子刚刚吃过猪肉仍然油腻的嘴唇，他的眼睛中闪过一丝恶毒之色，嘴角挑起来，隐藏着一种令人心悚的笑容，对弟媳妇说：“桂花，你先出去一下，我和保朝兄弟说句话。”
弟媳妇桂花领着儿子出去了。
保朝也看到二哥的脸色不对劲，以为是心疼那一斤猪肉，装作关心的说：“你的脸色不好看，没事吧二哥？嗨，不就是一块猪肉吗，下个集是我割一块，咱们哥俩喝二两。”
李二狗神秘一笑，低声说：“兄弟，我告诉你，你不要对别人说，那块猪肉，不是用来吃的，也不能吃！”
李保山心中咯噔一声，说：“你不是下老鼠药了吧？”
李二狗说：“老鼠药倒是没下，就是加了料，嘿嘿，嘿嘿，嘿嘿……”
李二狗这几声阴险的嘿嘿，把李保山笑的毛骨悚然，连忙问：“你到底加了什么料，快说呀！”
李二狗又嘿嘿笑了两声，眼睛中闪烁着恶毒的光芒，慢悠悠的说：“兄弟，既然你没吃，我就对你说实话吧，那块猪肉，不是用来吃的，是我用来当那个的……”
“哪个？”
李保山看到二哥眼中的笑意，一种冰冷的寒意让他全身的汗毛都竖立起来，他不敢想像下去，但还是要问个明白，也许自己猜测错了。
但，很不幸，非常非常不幸，李保山并没有猜错，因为当他问“哪个”的时侯，他二哥李二狗慢条斯理的伸出两只手掌，一个手掌握成拳头，但没有握实，拳心留有一个圆洞，另一个手掌四指握成拳头，却伸出一根手指，然后做了一个让李保山恐怖一生的动作，这个动作就像一个恐怖片的慢镜头，一一一寸一寸的折磨着李保山的神经，只不过这个恐怖片的被虐男主角，就是他自己！
李二狗做的那个动作，是：用一只手掌上伸出来的长长坚硬的手指，慢慢的捅入了另一只手掌握成的洞……
李保山看到二狗哥这个动作时，差晕了过去，他仿佛听到一个从遥远的地方传来的声音：
“你射里面了？”
声音是李保山自己发出来的，他听到了自己的喉咙在格格作响，他的眼前晃动着无数道金光，他只希望自己喝醉了，这只是一个梦，一个恶梦。
李二狗的回答更精典：“射了，真爽勒！”
李保山在这一刹那，体会到的，绝对是头皮一紧全身一麻的极度恐怖！李二狗的这句话没有说完，李保山就“哇哇哇嘎嘎嘎”的大吐特吐，吐的床上被上，到处都是，李二狗身上也有，但李二狗却很满足的笑了，笑的像头狼，笑的更像撒旦。
当然，这只是传说，没有得到李保山的证实，也没有人敢当面去问李保山，不过，据说从此之后，李保山是绝对不吃猪肉了，忌的比回民都清。当然李二和王芙都讨厌他绝不是因为这邪恶恶心的是，而是这家伙一直对王芙十分炎热，心怀不轨，按照王芙的说法就是【癞蛤蟆想吃天鹅肉】李二狗是个小气的人，非常非常小气，视钱如命，所以他虽然垂涎王芙的美色，但还是有怕，因为王芙和李三诈了王宝成一万块钱的事，人人皆知，李二狗怕的是王芙和李三又会诈他的钱，他的钱虽然不多，没有一万块，三千五千还是有的，如果被诈了去，可就是在割他的肉呀。
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