第六十八章 恶搞阎王
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第六十八章恶搞阎王
“梦龙,梦龙,你听到我的话了么?”
龙梦云立时感到了云梦龙这几乎微不可觉的抖动,她手上的力度不由加紧了一些,因为用力她的指关节微微发白。更多小说ltxsba.com爱情频道而她的声音,也激动的有些颤抖了。现在的龙梦云几乎是惊弓之鸟,她不再是那个决策千里,运筹帷幄的女中豪杰。她是一个小女孩,一个深怕爱郎不能醒来的小女孩,她很确定被她的泪珠儿打湿的云梦龙的手指轻轻动了一下,可是又深怕这只是一场捉弄人的幻觉。
云梦龙的意识仿佛被压在五行山下的孙悟空,彻底失去了纵横天地的本事儿。一百六十八个小时,他的意识一直处于九幽的暗黑之中,第八天凌晨见到一丝光明时,他“看见”阎王那张帅气的脸。
“呃,阎王?嗯,帅气?”
云梦龙的意识有些发愣。
“喂,帅哥,你哪位?”
意识很好学的不懂就要问道。
“我是阎王。”
那人穿一身大红锦袍,端坐在黑暗覆盖下的高高王座上,手里端着一杯可口可乐。
“我靠,你别晃我了,就你这德行,一看就是当鸭子的,这么帅当阎王,你脑袋有坑啊?”
云梦龙的意识立马反驳了过去。
阎王喝了一口可口可乐道:“唉,人类总是不遗余力的丑化我的形象,真是失败,见到我的人都说我锺馗是个帅哥,不过那些人却不能回到人间去洗刷我的清白了。”
“为什么不能?”
意识问。
“因为他们已经死了,人死了,就该根据他们在人世间做的事来评判他们来生做人还是为畜,又或者,打入地狱。”
阎王解释道。
“你说什么就是什么么?”
意识问。
“没错,这里我是老大,我说了算!”
阎王牛逼烘烘的昂然道,接着喝光了可乐道:“人间的饮料真是好喝,都说喝可乐容易阳萎。阎王我一身阴气,就不用怕了吧。小马,再来一瓶。”
把云梦龙强行请来的两个长得个性无比创意无限的家伙里的一个马脸在背后摸了两把,拿出一瓶可口可乐淫荡的笑道:“老大,给,这是我们抓云梦龙时从人间顺来的。”
阎王接过可乐拍拍马面的长脸道:“小马你辛苦了。”
“为老大服务!”
马面机灵的立正回道。
“靠,你这拍马屁的功夫真是快跟上我那些小弟了,你这样马脸没白长,自己拍自己的屁股,总是容易。”
云梦龙的意识很不爽,这俩王八蛋不经过他的同意,就用锁魂链把他锁来这么一个比黑社会都黑的地方,黑就黑吧,还冷飕飕的,阴风无处不在,没事儿就溜达出来了,而且还有些莫名其妙的鬼哭狼嚎的声音。阴间就是不发达啊,真穷,连颗蜡烛都买不起,更不用说日光灯了。云梦龙的意识一个礼拜没动静,这乍一活跃,想的东西还真多。
“哎!小马,你去把生死簿拿来。”
马面脸色变得十分难看,正待反唇相讥,却被阎王止住。
马面不诧的抱来一本厚的要死的旧的已经死了能够当传家宝的书,递给阎王。眼睛狠狠盯着云梦龙,云梦龙不以为意,继续道:“我说阎王帅哥,你把我带来是什么意思,莫非我死了?”
阎王也不答话,自顾自翻动着生死簿,翻了半天才找到云梦龙的资料,他浓黑的眉毛鲜有的紧紧蹙了起来,面色也变得极为凝重。
“云梦龙,生于公元一零零六年五月一日,卒年,不祥!”
阎王喃喃念道,他抬头静静看着云梦龙,一双虎目泛出耀眼神光。阎王用搜魂神眼看了云梦龙半晌,云梦龙的影响渐渐模糊,转而不见。
“他竟然没有来世今生,难道他已经跳出五行外,不在三界中?还是已经位列仙班?这都不可能啊!唉,愁死我了。”
阎王心中奇怪,脸上表情阴晴不定。
阎王低头一看更是乖乖不得了,那关于云梦龙的记录竟然开始淡去,慢慢变成一只杳然无踪的黄鹤。
“喂,你别走啊!”
阎王大叫道,处理了这么多年的灵魂,就没见过这么费劲的,当然有一次,那一次是梦魇啊,阎王打死都不想去回忆。
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