第九六四萌、来到少林
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第一更
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李岩带着几个名来的妹子,走上了去嵩山的路,嵩山被称为“中”岳,其地更位置也确实比较“中”,简单来说,嵩山就在汴京的西边很近的地方,众人没花多久时间,便来到了嵩山脚下。龙腾小说ltxsba.com
黑长直御姐左冷禅一边在前面带路,一边介绍道:“自古以来,嵩山就是皇帝like的地方,曾有30几位皇帝亲临,据传说还是神仙相聚take的洞天福地。”
李岩笑道:“有这么神?”
“of_course!”黑长直御姐道:“因为嵩山得天独厚的地理位置,这山上的门派多多少少都有野心……”
李岩心想:咦?这句话倒是有道理。嵩山上出名的就两个门派,一个是嵩山剑派,掌门是左冷禅。另一个就是嵩山少林寺了。这两个门派正好也都是很有野心的门派,嵩山一向以统一五岳剑派,再一统江湖为目标,野心勃勃。而少林寺也不是什么好鸟,自古就有“天下武功出少林”的说法,少林削尖了脑袋在武林中钻来钻去的,一天到晚刷存在感,总是想把少林捧为天下名门正派之首,那野心可是不小。
这时,燕狂徒突然插口道:“野心什么的最讨厌了,这江湖还能不能自由自在的玩耍了?燕某人最恨的就是野心家,逮住一个就往死里的打。”
黑长直御姐颇感尴尬:“野心有啥错?野心其实就是up进心,没有这东西的还叫人?”
燕狂徒抹了一把汗道:“说慢!up进心是什么东西?”
黑长直御姐哼哼道:“you武功虽高,却没文化。连english都听不懂。up进心就是上进心的意思。”
李岩用手捂住脸:“我的天。你丫那东西能叫英语吗?英国人会哭的。”
这时令狐冲也开口道:“上进心确实应该有,自己努力上进,那没问题,但不能一幅指挥家的样子,在江湖上摆着个老大的形象到处去叫别人做这做那,那样就变了味儿了。还有就是千万不能当面做一套,背后做一套,表面上正人君子。背地里坑蒙拐骗,那样的人就是人渣。”
听了她的话,众人一起捂脸:天啊,你师傅岳不群就是你口中的人渣你知道么?
大伙儿一起走在上山的小路上,萧秋水突然欢叫了一声,指着路边的一片竹林道:“看看,竹林……咱们进去看看,这片竹林里有没有虚竹。”
张无忌跟着她走了过去,指着一颗竹子道:“这是慈竹……这是单竹……这是四季竹……这边这种是硬头簧……这种叫水竹……这是罗汉竹……”她是学医的,能识百草。光是竹子这个种类,她就识得几十种。着实厉害,但她看了一圈之后,回头道:“虚竹是什么样子的?”
李岩捂着脸道:“别找啦,虚竹是一个人,是一个少林和尚,很丑……”
众妹子奇道:“你找一个丑和尚要做啥?收服西夏用得上他?”
李岩心想:这几个妹子都不是外人,稍稍向她们剧透一,只要不太过份,应该没有问题吧。于是考虑了一下说词,缓缓地道:“是这样的,西夏有个公主,差不多到了该嫁人的年龄,我掐指一算,这个公主应该会喜欢上一个叫虚竹的和尚,所以就要来找虚竹帮忙,让他去西夏娶了公主,这样就可以为大宋和西夏的结盟打好基础了……”
众妹子大汗:“不是吧?让和尚去娶公主?而且还是丑和尚?这有不靠谱啊。”
李岩也汗了一把:“我也知道不靠谱,但是……咳咳……很多事不能光看表面,所谓世事无常啊……”他说到这里,突然脑门一醒,对了,我差忘了这个位面是很没节操的,万一虚竹也被娘化了变成妹子,那西夏公主要怎么办?
想到这里,李岩流了一地的汗水:“咳咳,左冷禅,你对江湖上的事比较了解,我想向你咨询一个问题,少林寺会招收女弟子吗?”
黑长直御姐道:“no招!少林寺的门规比全真教什么的还要严得多,绝不可能招收女弟子。”
李岩听了这话,大感欣慰,好啊,终于出现了一个比较正常的门派,这下虚竹总不会娘化了吧?哦,不对,还有可能女扮男装啥的。
但他仔细一想又觉得不可能,女扮男装这种事,也就走江湖的时候偶尔做一下,你说一个女人在少林寺里扮和尚扮了十几年,这可能么?当然是不可能。周围的同门师兄弟就算再蠢也能看出来你有不对劲吧。
李岩顿时信心满满,笑道:“这一次,我终于不会被位面坑了,哈哈哈哈。”
众妹子见他大笑,虽然不知道他笑什么,但也跟着开心。
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