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第九八五萌、这也太扯了吧

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薜神医轻叹道:“此事说来话长,我就简单说吧……我逍遥派有难了,急需要一个情商无敌的英雄侠少去帮忙解决。”

李岩大汗:“你逍遥派有难应该找个武功高强的人去解决吧,为啥要找情商无敌的?”

薜神医道:“这个……咳……事情是这样的,我逍遥派师祖逍遥子,一共收了三个徒弟。”

李岩听到这句话,条件反射般地道:“无崖子、李秋水、天山童姥,三角恋!”

薜神医大吃一惊:“哎哟,情圣大人,你……你居然对我逍遥派如此了解?看来我会省下不少解说的功夫了。”

李岩大汗:“你还是说清楚吧,我怕我了解的和真实的有些出入。”李岩对这个没节操的位面已经彻底害怕了,现在完全不敢乱猜,还是让当事人自己说比较好。

薜神医道:“确如情圣大人所说,这是一件三角恋的故事。无崖子师祖是个英俊侠少,李秋水和天山童姥两位师祖都爱慕着无崖子师祖……”

李岩了头,看来暂时还和原著一样。

这时薜神医话音一转:“本来,李秋水师祖和天山童姥师祖如果一起嫁给无崖子师祖,这件事就能完美解决,或者无崖子师祖任选其一,拒绝另一个,只要事情处理得好,也能解决,但是……无崖子师祖偏偏是个情商为负的人。”

“噗!”李岩大汗:“情商为负?”

薜神医叹了口气道:“是的,情商为负!无崖子师祖面对两个喜欢自己的姑娘,一时茫然,不知道该怎么办,他既不懂得左右逢源,也不懂得挥慧剑斩情丝,结果三个人就这么不清不楚,不明不白地混日子。”

李岩的汗水开始流了,这尼玛,我和好些个喜欢我的妹子好像也是不明不白,不清不楚的混着啊,怎么感觉心里有不安?

薜神医道:“后来李秋水师祖和天山童姥师祖终于混不下去了,两人大打出手,火拼了起来,本来这时候就该无崖子师祖出来拿个决断,给两女一个交待了,但是情商负满分的无崖子师祖不知道怎么办才好,情急之下,找了个悬崖,跳崖自尽,想用这样的方法来解决争端。”

我晕!李岩大汗:这是逃避吧?这人的情商看来比我还要低啊。我虽然有呆,但到了这种时候,也是能做得出决断的,绝不会跳崖自尽了事。

李岩忍不住接口道:“看到无崖子师祖跳崖,李秋水和天山童姥十分失望,两人也不想打架了,于是李秋水远走西夏隐居,天山童姥则创立了灵鹫宫,是吗?”

薜神医拍手道:“情圣大人太厉害了,这样的情报是哪里来的?”

李岩又抹了一把汗:“那这件事和我没关系啊,你找我有个啥用?”

薜神医道:“总之,事情本来就这样算了,但是……无崖子师祖其实根本就没有死。他跳崖之后摔断了腿,好不容易调理好了伤,再爬出山谷来,后来就有了我们这些徒子徒孙。”

李岩“呃”了一声。

薜神医道:“无崖子师祖就一直隐姓埋名的活了下来,他传给本门的北冥神功、凌破微步等等武学,本来是用自己作画像,后来也随便在江湖中找了一个无名小卒的样子来当样本画了。”

李岩大汗,心想:我在无量山找到北冥神功时,上面的画用的是我的脸,现在想来,应该是无崖子用江枫的脸做参照物画的。

薜神医道:“本来这事情就这样算完了,没想到,最近这些日子里,天山童姥师祖和李秋水师祖突然又斗起来了。”

李岩汗道:“都是两个老太婆了,还有啥麻烦好斗的?”

薜神医道:“若只是两个老太太确实没啥好斗的,关键是,她们都有传承啊,李秋水师祖收了一个徒弟,据说是西夏公主,尽得她的真传。而天山童姥也收了个四徒弟,叫做梅兰竹菊四剑女,也是很厉害的角色。”

顿了顿,又道:“前不久,西夏国王发布国书,说打算给西夏公主招个驸马,让女儿能过上幸福的生活。本来这是好事,但没想到天山童姥知道了这件事之后大为愤怒,说是她的亲事当年是被李秋水给搅黄的,心爱的男人还被李秋水给逼得跳了崖,怎能让李秋水的徒弟过上好日子?她就派出了梅兰竹菊四剑女,扬言要去施美人计,非把西夏公主的驸马给抢走不可。”

李岩大汗,我擦,这也太扯了吧?

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