第二百三十四章 杀猪风波
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虾皮自然又在板起脸孔骂人了，不过这回骂的不是黄跑跑，而是李寿生、谢可等一干人：“你们是干什么吃的？连只猪也摁不住？还吹牛缚龙、缚虎，我看你们连鸡都缚不住”
他接着又骂钱老2和衡其：“你们两个是专业的屠夫，为什么让一个业余的黄跑跑去杀？一个‘五爪猪’的传说就让你们吓破了胆？我看你们完全丧失了马可史主义、列里主义的唯物主义者的本色，彻底地沦陷到了唯心主义、封建迷信的深渊”
偏偏这时，晴朗的天空变得阴沉了起来，接着下起了冰雹。下冰雹某种意义上等同于下雪老神立刻望着天空道：“六月飞雪，不是好兆头啊”
“嗯，看来这头‘五爪猪’一定有冤情”农民也赞同道。
虾皮气得大叫一声：“我要被你们气死了”
然而他刚嚷出了这一句，嘴巴忽然歪斜到了一边，好象抽了风一样，再也回不到原位了，接着嘴角流出了涎水，眼睛也翻出了眼白。
众人吃了一惊道：“虾皮怎么了？”
老神仔细看了虾皮一眼，忽然惊恐万状道：“不好了，虾皮中了邪了”
虾皮想要反驳老神，但嘴巴无法复位，自然什么话也骂不出来，只能在那里“唔唔唔唔”，那情景很有几分骇人。
“虾皮得罪了猪大仙，被种了绛头，邪魔附体了，必须要赶快驱除邪魔”老神一本正经地看着虾皮道。
农民道：“怎样驱除邪魔啊？”
老神先从身上摸出一张黄符纸贴在虾皮的额头上，接着喝道：“先将他绑起来”
于是农民和龙拐、朱疯子等人一拥而上，将虾皮用一条麻绳绑了起来。老神再指令众人烧起一盆火，然后将虾皮绑在一根大杠子上，两边着人抬着，将虾皮放在火的上空熏烤——实际上火不大，全是浓烟。这些烟熏得虾皮眼泪鼻涕直流，那种苦楚可不是一般的难受，直到将他熏得昏死了过去，然后丢在一边的地上。
众人悄声问老神道：“老神，你也太歹毒了吧，哪有这样报复人家的？”
老神低声道：“你们不懂，这就叫以毒攻毒，他现在被邪祟上了身，只有用‘三昧真火’将邪祟熏出来，他才能复原，否则便不能好，永远会成为歪嘴”
这当儿，杨浩、唐军、赵俊杰、王显平、龙庭卫等人已经抬着那头“五爪猪”走了回来。那头猪在逃亡的过程中血流怠尽，终于倒在了地上，叫杨浩等人逮住了。
杨浩等人看见地上躺着一个被烟熏得乌黑的人，不由大感惊讶道：“这是谁？为什么弄成了这样？”
众人答道：“这是虾皮，因为被邪祟上了身，所以老神用烟给他熏一下。”
“老神，这是怎么回事？”杨浩严肃地看着老神道。
老神道：“是这样，刚才你们离开后，虾皮不停地骂我们，估计是他骂得太过用力，致使嘴部肌肉生了痉挛，不能复位，我只好用这个方法为他治疗一下。”
“用烟熏人家，就是治疗？”唐军嗤道。
“当时虾皮的情绪很激动，几乎见一个骂一个，如果不让他冷静下来，我估计他会变得更加歇斯底里，唯一的办法就是让他昏过去。让他昏过去有两种办法，一是打他的头，但这样会引起脑部的后遗症，所以只有采用烟熏的办法……”
“真是太岂有此理了，要是把你也这么熏一下，你受得了吗？”唐军嗤道。
老神嘿嘿笑道：“我错了，不过虾皮爱骂人的毛病也确实该治治。”
“好了，别扯谈了，赶快把这两头大肥猪处理了吧，今天晚上我们还等着吃猪肉呢”舒文叫道。
“这两头猪的肉最好还是分开一下，哪一盆是好猪肉，哪一盆是‘五爪猪’肉，都要标个清楚”农民叫道。
当天晚上，养猪场大院里是灯火通明，三四十号人坐满了五张八仙大桌，每个桌上都摆满了菜碟，菜碟里的猪肉散着诱人的香味，引得人的食欲大起。
然而众人正要开饭时，却听农民一拍脑袋道：“哎呀，好猪肉和‘五爪猪’肉我忘了标注一下了，现在分不清哪些碟里是好猪肉、哪些碟里是‘五爪猪肉’了”
“什么？农民你这不是害我们吗？”众人纷纷叫嚷了起来。
杨浩道：“我还是希望大家不要相信这些迷信，不管它是什么肉，我们都要把它们吃掉”
色农忽然说道：“大家不必犯愁，我告诉大家一个方法怎样分辨好猪肉和‘五爪猪肉’。好猪肉的色泽非常光鲜，肉质松脆、甘甜可口、香味袭人；而‘五爪猪肉’则带有一股酸酸的味道，肉的色泽也象牛肉那样是红色的，而不是猪肉的粉色，这是因为……算了，不说了。”
“色农你卖什么关子？快说吧”众人纷纷叫道。
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