第二十五章 跟神机说相声
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将棪和青暝司一诺也击掌庆祝。
我也大大松了口气，虽然毛毛他们告诉我五千仙元在仙域买起装备来根本不算什么，但是不考虑买装备，还是可以养活我很久的。
而其他新生也会和我一样根据视频点击量不同获得不同的奖金，这些奖金来自于大家的点击，在大家点击之时，已经扣除了一定的费用，这个过程有点类似我们凡间的流量。
中午，我请大家吃烤鸭！
可怜的将棪还是只能看着我们吃。作为一个吃货，如果只能看不能吃那无疑是对我的最大折磨。
下午，我开始在房间里研究神机。
神机就像电影里的高科技一样，操作简单，功能全面，而且有问必答。
“郭德纲。”
“在~~您有什么吩咐。”郭德纲的圆脸出现在透明的手机屏幕上。
我躺在床上看看房门，想了想问：“为什么仙域那么老土，还讲究仙凡有别？”
“哟！您这个问题可闻倒我了，要不我让我手下于谦来跟您解释？”
“你还带于谦来？”
“哈哈，跟您开个玩笑，于谦我放家里避嫌了。”
“……我怎么感觉跟郭德纲语音对话像说相声……”
“相声好啊！抨击丑恶，藿香正气。”
“……”我真无语了。
郭德纲西瓜一样的圆脑袋在手机里扭扭头，贼眉鼠眼地像是真有人偷听一样小声说：“您怎能说老土呢，您看，神仙，凡人，寿命不一样，如果神仙爱上凡人，提拔凡人做神仙，这不走后门儿吗？你们凡间不最讨厌这种裙带关系？”
我细细一想，还真是这么回事，听他这么一说，怎么感觉神仙爱凡人该做凡人是正确的。
“您看，您想通了是不？所以神仙爱上凡人做凡人，对谁都公平，而且，又不是神仙不回来做神仙了，只是在这一世，他得做凡人，丫头看着不傻啊，心肝脾肺肾也都不缺，怎么就缺点儿脑呢~~~”
噗——感情我啥都不缺就缺脑啊！我居然被一手机给“调。戏”了。这手机内置的程序怎么那么强大，就真跟郭德纲附体一样！
“那为啥神魔之子还急着结婚？”得，我也被带成北方口音了。我想如果在神魔学院什么都没学成，倒是可以回凡间改说相声。
“丫头你该吃点药了，我这儿有脑残片，要不要来两片？”他居然真拿出一瓶脑残片，我耷拉着眼睛看他，他嘻嘻一笑，收回药瓶，“姑娘你傻啊，他们不结婚就得跟您一样做凡人了。”
“做凡人？”我吃惊起来。
神机里的郭德纲点点头：“这儿的规矩，没结婚的就得下凡去历劫，您说历劫是件多可怕的事儿？谁知道你投胎后是蟑螂还是乞丐？历劫就没好的，这些神魔之子，舒服日子过惯了，谁都不愿下凡做凡人去，但大家都在六界少有来往啊，这不，才整出一个神魔学院让大家在一起，互相认识，互相了解一下，其实，这儿就是一相亲点儿。丫头，你本来就是个凡人，所以不受这条规矩影响，不用怕，但越高贵的神族，越害怕，你，懂了不？“
我恍然点头：“我明白了，谢谢你给我普及神魔学院的规矩。”
“嘿，不谢，床前明月光，疑是地上霜，举头望明月，有事儿您问郭，德，纲。今天，就说到这儿，散场我请客，谁去谁掏钱~~~”郭德纲消失了，留下一堆惊讶。
/em
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