第一零六八章 于是，小兰把洗衣机打了一顿……
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舒允文极度无语中，服部平次也没等舒允文回答，快步走到了尸体前，先摸了摸尸体的脖子，然后操着一口关西腔道：
“没有脉搏，这个人确实已经死掉了，而且看样子，死掉应该还没有多久……”
服部平次说着话，毛利大叔已经一脸不爽地抓住了服部的后脖领，把服部平次拽了起来，不满地说道：“喂喂喂！你是从哪儿冒出来的小鬼？这里是命案现场，不是你玩侦探游戏的地方，别在这里捣乱好不好？”
毛利大叔话落，服部平次立刻挣脱开了毛利大叔的手，继续用关西腔回答道：“大叔，什么叫玩侦探游戏？这话太伤人了吧？还有，只不过是一段时间没见而已，大叔你居然就忘了我是谁，未免太无情了！”
服部平次话刚说完，体育馆的灯光忽然亮了起来。
在灯光下，毛利大叔仔细盯着跟前这个脸白的不像话还掉渣的男人，嘴角抽搐了两下，有点懵逼——
话说，刚才只听说话的声音，似乎应该是大阪来的那个高中生侦探小鬼，可是这张脸实在是……
毛利大叔正懵逼中，服部平次已经适时地摘下了帽子，抖了抖自己的头发，然后脸上一边掉渣一边用关西腔自我介绍：
“大叔，我是工藤新一啊！”
服部平次话音刚落，毛利大叔、和叶他们都“哈”了一声，舒允文更是忍不住捂住了双眼，不忍直视——
妈蛋！服部你是哪个戏精学校毕业的？我特么看的尴尬癌都犯了！
还有，拜托大哥你自我介绍的时候说一句关东腔也行啊！
你这一本正经地用关西腔说自己是“工藤新一”，真的不是来搞笑的吗？
舒允文无力吐槽，周围的围观群众也嘈杂了起来，至于刚刚跑到舒允文他们跟前的工藤新一更是一个踉跄，差点没摔倒，一脑门儿黑线地盯着持续掉渣中的服部平次——
我去你大爷的！这是哪个李鬼在假扮我？你特么是上天派来整我的吧？
工藤新一欲哭无泪，冢本数美则凑到了舒允文身旁，表情古怪地问道：“允文君，如果我没有猜错的话，这个人该不会是……”
冢本数美话没说完，和叶已经站在了服部平次的跟前，伸出手指在平次的脸上擦了一下，然后一脸嫌弃：“平次！你在搞什么鬼？怎么在脸上抹这么多粉？”
服部平次被瞬间识破，连忙“啊咧”一声，然后挠了挠头，指着自己的鼻子，继续用关西腔结结巴巴地说着：
“你是不是认错了啊？你仔细看看，我才不是服部平次，我是工藤！工藤！”
服部平次还想狡辩，毛利大叔已经“Duang”地一拳砸到了服部平次的头上，怒斥道：“大阪来的小鬼！这里是命案现场，不是化装舞会，给我滚到旁边去！”
“哈哈哈……是。”服部平次挨了一拳，终于老实了，沮丧地走到了舒允文身旁，拿着手帕擦起了脸，抱怨道：
“可恶！和叶那个女人……我天衣无缝的计划啊……”
你还天衣无缝？
舒允文嘴角抽搐，正准备吐槽上两句，旁边忽然传来了小兰低沉的声音：“喂，服部，你为什么扮成新一的样子？是新一让你做的吗？”
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