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第八十八章、《鬼影实录》很搞笑(二)

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直到这时,哈利才恍然大悟,原来女主不是请灵媒师来家做爱做的事,而是有正事儿。原来在很长时间里,女主经常受到各类幻觉的困扰,就像嗑了药似的。所以,灵媒师也的确先问她有没有服用致幻类药物。

简而言之,女主受到这方面的困扰很久了,但是痛苦似乎不大,就是很烦人,说白了自己倒霉,恰好八字软,阴气重。

然后女主就开始描述自己以前的灵异经历:我经常能被一阵呼吸声吵醒……应该算是一大团吧,一团影子矗立在床脚……这种事在第一个家发生过,然后发生火灾了,所以就搬家了……

哈利对女主的遭遇表示同情,并诚挚地表示,希望她马上又能遭殃,不然自己来电影院看什么呢?

虽然女主的家人都安然无恙,但通灵师想知道,这起火灾和一直缠着女主的事物之间有无联系。根据他的分析,这“东西”从女主八岁起跟随者她,一直持续到现在,搬家也没用,显然是人家妖魔鬼怪跟她个人肛上了,不是守株待兔的地缚灵那么简单。

女主还说了好多的灵异现象,比如灯泡会闪啊闪,水龙头自己开关,还有指甲划墙的声音。这声音究竟多刺耳,哈利是不知道,但看女主爪子在半空中磨来磨去的样子,他是牙酸了。

最后,女主表示,那些喜闻乐见的故事主要还是发生在卧室的。嗯,所以男主向灵媒师展示装备,他要贯彻自己富二代的先天优势,以三脚架和广角摄像机拍下一切,并记录在录像带里以便随时观看。

灵媒师表示,你想当冠希哥随你,反正人家恶魔是不会害羞滴,只要你媳妇不反对,爱咋折腾咋折腾,他管不着。

大意如此吧,反正哈利和全场观众都在乐个不停,爆米花都白买了。

然而接下来,有点意外的事发生了。

也许是早就受了女主N多年毛病的刺激吧,在给灵媒师介绍了半天后,男主的脑神经忽然转了个弯,表示既然本少爷装备这么齐全,干嘛不主动刺激一下那个妖魔鬼怪,让他在本少爷面前主动显个形呢?

男主顿时被自己的聪明才智佩服到了。

但哈利却忍不住又吐槽了。

这位大哥,那恶魔每逢半夜跑你家卧室,就是为了偷窥你媳妇睡觉的吧?

就这么把它召唤出来?

你们是想玩合家欢吗!?

还有,这导演的节操究竟在哪里啊喂!?

或许也是被男主的聪明才智震慑到了吧,灵媒师很快就表示,小的我才疏学浅,实在不配伺候您这尊大神,我这儿还有另一个灵媒师的名片,请收好,咱先告辞了。

然后临走前,男主表示,本少爷有一套碟仙装备,橙的,史诗级的,家传的,老牛逼了,能用来试试不?

通灵师很严肃地回答道:不行!

不过显然,通灵师可不觉得自己能劝住男主,不过想到反正作死的不是自己,那他爱咋折腾咋折腾吧,反正这包袱是扔给另一个同行了。

然后,通灵师就告辞了。

然后,哈利很清楚地意识到,喜闻乐见的情节马上就要发生了。

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