第533章 以下都是我瞎编的
最新网址：m.ltxsdz.com
一开始这仅仅是超市生鲜部门的自发行为，可后来家电部门觉着这一点可以利用啊！来来来……，到我们这里购买一台液晶电视，送一桶‘至尊’方便面。于是家电部门发现他们的销售业绩直线上升！
结果大家发现，只要能跟‘至尊’方便面搭上关系，销量都是坐直升飞机般的飞速上升。
很快，卖汽车的开始改变。4S店里只要搭配一桶‘至尊’，让客户试车之余吃的舒心畅快，交易成功率提高几倍啊！
过去想要业绩，卖房子的小姐少不了还要牺牲色相。可只打‘至尊’方便面上市，售楼小姐也紧紧跟随潮流。关键时候只要说一声‘先生，我们这里开始送买房‘至尊’了’，于是轻松卖房不再是难事。
从今往后，业务员想要提高业绩，看的不是多有人脉，不是多能吹牛，不是多能拉关系，而是看掌握多少‘至尊’方便面。拥有最多‘至尊’的人往往被称为面霸！
从今往后，给领导送礼拿给多钱都没用，要是没一桶‘至尊’是绝对办不成事。甚至连准女婿见丈母娘，一桶‘至尊’下肚大家都能高兴起来，说不定不要房子车子存款什么的就能把老婆娶到手。
得抑郁症的人只要吃了‘至尊’，他都能立刻快乐高歌，笑容满面。从此不在愁肠百结，闷闷不乐，分分钟念头通达，对生活重新升起希望的火花。
得癌症的患者也不再发愁，都说快乐是杀死癌细胞的最佳药物，而现在吃一桶‘至尊’，就能保证快乐三小时。一天到晚的吃下去，保证癌细胞都要在笑声中慢慢萎缩，从此人生道路再次通畅，岁月静好，从容享受。
精神病的患者被关在精神病院是多么痛苦，来一桶‘至尊’吧。错乱的思维将被恢复，扭曲的思想将被理顺，偏执的行为得到纠正。患者家属都喜极而泣，我们终于得救啦！
白癜风，癫痫，便秘痔疮，秃头掉发，不孕不育，阳痿早泄，短小，包皮过长，肿痛，白带过多，皮肤暗沉，呃……，虽然‘至尊’方便面不能治好这些疾病，但能让人快乐，坦然面对嘛！
打LOL还被人骂做小学生吗？来一桶‘至尊’吧，保证你心情舒畅，斗志昂扬。被否定的人生再次发愤图强，从此屡战屡败，屡败屡战，在挫折和磨难中成就白金梦想！
而对于真正的小学生，一桶‘至尊’就可以补充满满的正能量，注意力更集中，大脑思维更活跃，学习变得更加快乐。哪怕熊孩子中二作死的时候，也能笑着面对爸爸妈妈的皮鞭子。
而对于中学生，你还在为《五年高考三年模拟》而头疼吗？来一桶‘至尊’吧，它能让你坦然面对惨淡的人生。心情好才能发挥好嘛，心情好智力水才能高嘛，心情好哪怕考砸了也能笑嘛！
建议全国所有家长在高考前都给孩子准备一桶‘至尊’，让孩子高高兴兴的进场，快快乐乐的答题，欢欢喜喜的离开。哪怕交了白卷也没关系，做人一定要开心。
而大学生，硕士生，博士生，哪怕教授院士级别的大牛，你们难道不需要快乐吗？都来一桶‘至尊’方便面吧，所谓‘笑一笑，十年少’，祖国的现代化建设任重道远，你们需要微笑面对，一往无前！
‘至尊’方便面是欢乐的源泉，是幸福的根基，是和谐的保障。让我们拥抱未来，拥抱‘至尊’吧！
我……，实在编不下去了！
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