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第369章 祖国需要你,人民需要你!

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要知道,一头大象中了麻醉枪都得拖个几十秒或几分钟才能晕厥呢,何况这么一头大猪王?

正在X和O中的猪王金山胖怒了,麻比的,你们人类太坏了,又打扰本王的好事。想让我阳萎啊?

此等大仇不共等天,给我死!

下一秒,猪王金山胖发了疯一样的冲向了朱子龙和他的小伙伴们。

我去!

面对以金山胖为首的超级大肥猪们,发起的群体性疯狂冲锋陷阵。

这一秒,朱子龙和小伙伴们都惊呆了,脸色一下子就白如雪!

想象一下吧,全是十几吨重的家伙,比大象还大,只少一百多头,后面还有像老虎和狼一样大的猪仔也跟着跑。

这不禁让朱子龙的头脑之中,想起了几个以前看过的新闻!

2014年08月06日01:40重庆晨报:五十公斤野猪遭村民围堵,发怒咬死三人,重伤五人。

2014年11月21日,合肥市经开区天都路和芙蓉路交口,一头三百多斤的野猪横穿马路。被发现后野猪受惊,连续撞上N名正在工作的绿化工人。其中N名工人还被野猪撕咬受伤,不致身亡!

2015年01月14日宁波日报:200公斤野猪蹿入公园发狂,多人受伤,警员开枪打中猪体30多枪,才将其打死。

俺的娘也,几十公斤和一百多公斤的野猪发起狂来就这么牛肉比了。

现在是几十吨的猪王带头,还有一群母猪个个达万公斤以上,这是要命呀,怎么把这事忘记了。

因为事情的进展太顺利了,竞然不记得野猪们,真到了疯狂的时候,可是无人敌的。

一时间,以朱子龙为首的众人,撒腿就跑。

“救命啊啊啊啊……”无数人在跑路中,本能的叫出了经典台词。

“别站一起,分开跑,转圈后向世界巨树集合……”朱子龙一看急了,大家向一个方向跑,还不是找死,连忙下令。

大家一听有道理呀,我们这边也有快一百个人,分开跑的话,平均后面只有二三头猪在猛追,比起现在几百头一起在后面,简直不要太轻松。于是呼,众人连忙分开跑。

不过,很快,大家就发现了有些诡异而又惊喜的一个画面。

嗯,原来跑的跑的,众人发现后面竞然一只猪都没有了?

那猪都到哪里去了呢?

原来,全都跟在朱子龙后面了。这货天生就长了一张吸引仇恨的MT坦克脸,再加上猪王最恨他,结果就没有结果了,全跟在他后面了。

这一刻,朱子龙同志泪流满面。心想,又不是我开的枪打你的小弟弟,干嘛全死跟在我后面?冤枉呀,二师兄!

一时间,但凡朱子龙经过的地方,大地发抖,宛如在地震。所过之处是万人空巷,所有人对他是避之如瘟疫,在他身边三百米范围内连老鼠都不敢停留,真是闻者伤心,见者吓尿!

于是,他也开始狂叫经典台词了:“救命啊啊啊啊啊……”

然而,谁有胆子来抢救他?

甚至于,女军官林美眉还在远处冲朱子龙大喊:“头,你一定要拖住那几百只肥猪怪,为我们赢得反击的机会,现在你立即向人少的地方跑,把那些怪物引开!”

朱子龙:“……囧!”

靠!回过神来的朱子龙以中指比视林美眉,大声在远处回答道:“我去!美眉同志,我也是老百姓呀,军人不是要保护老百姓吗?老子都要挂了!”

朱子龙这话当然是说的吐槽玩的,然而,林美眉似乎是当真了。

她突然再道:“头,你现在是数百人的民兵连长级别了,也算是半个军人。现在祖国需要你,人民需要你,是你立功的时候了。我的军衔是少校,你是连长,我现在命令你立即往人少的地方跑!”

朱子龙闻言,再次:“……囧!”

“没有官方认证,我狗屁的连长。我是老百姓呀,现在老子需要救命。有种你和我一起在这个方向跑?”朱子龙继续吐槽。

林美眉听了朱子龙的话,立时沉默不语了,就在朱子龙以为她知道错了的时候。

下一分钟,突然间,林美眉再次大叫:“好!我陪你一起,要死一起死!”

说完这句,林美眉一个加速,趁朱子龙转弯的时候,以直线跑了过来,和他并肩而行,共同面对后面的数百头肥猪。

“窝靠……囧!”这下,朱子龙直接无语了。我就开个玩笑,妹子有必要这么认真吗?

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