第1546章 抽烟、喝酒、烫头
最新网址:m.ltxsdz.com
这一日,佛门新近传奇组合中的道济禅师,带着自己的女搭档,师妃暄小师太一路南下一路向西,同样一路开挂,留下满地血腥。最新地址ltxsba.info傍晚时分,终于抵达庐陵郡。
接着,道济禅师孤身来到当地寺庙。自然不是投宿or化缘,而是一番勒索敲诈,带着小师太住进了本地最豪华的旅店。
嗯……请大家不要误会,禅师开了两间房。
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话说一开始,李白与师妃暄二人男女搭配干活不累,一个‘以杀积德,造福人间’;另一个精通炒作,包办后期宣传。两人顿时赢得偌大名声,并且随着‘全国巡回积德作案’,人气越来越高。
但很快,事情的发展就出乎了师仙子的预料。主要原因有三:道济禅师太帅、道济禅师太强、道济禅师辈分太高……
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帅这点不必细说,佛门秃头千千万,包浆的脑壳千篇一律,但能够驾驭这个发型的帅脸却万里挑一。李白不才,正是那寥寥无几舍弃头发后,依旧骚出一片天的类型。完爆认真脸琦玉,赶超徐克版法海。
因为相貌堂堂英俊倜傥,道济作为佛门鲜肉,很容易获得群众好感。当然就第一印象而言,他还是逊色妃暄小师太的。毕竟后者生的国色天香,比他更有核心竞争力。
但很快,小师太的风头就被道济禅师抢光。毕竟他们是‘实力派除魔组合’,主要爆点新闻全靠打杀反派。其他都是虚的,唯有战绩才是一切。
李白稳坐资深宗师宝座,杀人从不用第二招,一出手根本没有师太发挥的余地,几乎局局无双场场碾压,打的畅快淋漓,各种高端骚操作,从不吝啬在人前显圣,反而坚定走杀鸡儆猴路线,每次出手都引起围观,打的血肉横飞特效十足炒鸡刺激。
每次他离去后,更有当地寺庙派出大量和尚进行洗地工作,逼格十足,更加渲染出他的强大与排场。‘释门修罗,一拳禅师’不胫而走。
到后来,大家才意识到这哪里是双人组合?静斋仙子原来是道济禅师的经纪人啊,负责帮他宣传、炒作、安排行程,联系寺庙进行保洁、收缴接管霸占恶势力产业的小助手啊!
这么貌美如花,还聪明能干的小师太,禅师果真会享受啊!
随着‘巡回积德’搞得热热闹闹红红火火,李白也彻底扬名。接着,一小撮为他高深佛法所倾倒的铁杆粉,深挖道济禅师情报,得知他乃道信圣僧亲传弟子,禅宗五祖预备役,辈分足足比‘师仙子’高出一级,与斋主梵清惠平辈论交,妥妥‘少年前辈’后,又引起一小波骚动。
顿时更加断定,师妃暄是佛门阵营专门为禅师安排的贴身生活小师太。
至此,师妃暄的出道扬名计划失败了一半。她虽然成功出位,为广大群众所知,但效果却大打折扣,风头反而被‘道济僧僧’喧宾夺主抢走一大半,迅速火遍全国。
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此时天色傍晚,道济禅师出手阔绰,又喜欢安静,因此包下一整层,与师妃暄这个同龄的小师侄共进晚餐,气氛烘托的恰到好处。
“来,妃儿师侄这边坐。咳咳,师叔我这么称呼,你不介意吧?”
李白随手拉出身边的凳子,对小师太发出邀请。双方同吃同住一段时间后,也从陌生变为熟悉,李白总是忍不住逗弄一番,就好像撩拨猫猫狗狗小宠物一般。
自从他脱离四圣僧的监控后,李白随着双方距离的拉长而越发放飞自我,逐渐在全新‘圣光偶像’基础上,找回曾经的‘自我’,但又不是补天李雷的‘阴搓搓’风格,反而带上一种佛门独有的堂皇大气。
简单说,就是我无耻也无耻的光明正大理所应当令人拜服。
师妃暄闻言眼角抽搐,感觉对方最近越发放肆,最终忍无可忍直言道:“还是有些介意的,禅师叫我‘妃暄’即可。”
“哎……你还是太年轻了!”李白露出一副你没有通过我的考验的表情,发出太让我失望的语气,神态语气流露出一股高高在上的优越感,反而勾起小师太的争胜心。
这段时日,她总是被对方或主动或不经意的撩拨、打压,处处占据下风,心中隐隐累积一股无名火。
“禅师此言何意?”
“妃儿师侄你可知咱们此行,不止是替你扬名。帝心师叔曾嘱咐我,要多多帮你加强‘佛门精神文明建设’,让我毫不私藏的授你佛法。而我这段时日,便将禅宗佛法融入生活的一举一动中,借此来考验你的悟性,潜移默化培养你,然而……你令我失望了!”李白哀叹道。
两个人已经逐渐混熟,身边又没有大佬监视,李白准备玩些高难度的,正好拿师妃暄解闷。
“???”
师妃暄一愣,接着便转为委屈,这段时间你一直在骚扰我好吧!哪里有传我佛法?
“怎么?你看起来很不服气的样子,难道认为师叔在骗你吗?我辈分这么高,需要骗你这个小辈?”李白过足了嘴瘾,做痛心疾首状,开口道,“我来问你,你觉得师叔这段时间所作所为如何评价?”
小师太这段时间,被李白仗着身份百般欺压,如今又出言不逊训斥自己,于是不再婉转,直言道:“满手血腥,罪孽深重!”
“nave啊!”李白摇头,“师叔手持佛牒,杀人不斩因果,何谈罪孽?而我所杀之人,各个罪有应得死有余辜。我杀一便是救十,斩业不斩人,这是功德!”
师妃暄反驳道:“出家人慈悲为怀,明明能够劝化度化,为何偏要杀死?何况,无论你怎么标榜,杀人本身就是‘罪’!众生平等,你又有何资格终结他人生命?”
“师叔我最讨厌的,便是‘放下屠刀立地成佛’,你看看天下各大寺院有多少沦为藏污纳垢之所,就一句‘放下屠刀’便能洗清罪孽吗?我这是在净化佛门啊。”李白语重心长的反驳。
“哦?那禅师你出自补天阁,又怎当得起‘放下屠刀’?”小师太眼含嘲讽看向李白,挑衅道。你不就是天底下最大的恶人吗?
啪!!!
李白怒拍桌面,发出惊雷炸响,接着脸带喜色,道了一声:“好!”
“妃妃师侄,你终于有几分开悟的迹象了!师叔我,可是从未放下屠刀的啊!你所言不差,我出身魔道,罪孽深重,根本没有资格立地成佛,而我也从未妄想过成佛!”李白演技一开,影帝模式上线,陷入回忆杀当中,利用精神力场感染对方。
“嗯?”师妃暄懵逼了,还有你这种操作?居然承认了!一时间不知道该怎么继续攻击,原本她还以为李白要继续狡辩下去,精力都用在这方面。
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