第六百四十九章 香消
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一伏寿身子一颤，面色有些苍白，抬头看向刘协，蹙眉反问：“陛下，自回雒阳以来，妾身可曾出过宫禁？”
刘协默然。龙腾小说ltxsba.com
伏寿又问：“大将军可曾出入宫禁？”
刘协还是默然无语。
“敢问陛下，既是两不相见，私从何而来！”
伏寿冷笑一声，心中极为愤怒，她性情刚烈，刘协污蔑她自己倒没什么，因为她心中有私，但她不能害了张辽，让张辽背负恶名。她心慕张辽，但那是单方面的，张辽此前根本不知道，所谓的私情根本谈不上！
而且伏寿对张辽除了那种心慕的感情，更有感恩和尊敬，刘协如此没有底线的污蔑真正激怒了她，所以她的言辞也毫不客气，带上了讥讽和鄙夷之意。
面对伏寿的质问，刘协有些难堪，恼羞成怒之下，叱骂道：“雒阳无之，在关中霸陵汝与他相处数日，在河东郡一年之期，未必无之！”
伏寿闻言，怔怔的看着刘协狰狞的面孔，蓦然无由的笑了两声，旋即泪如雨下，目光黯淡，心如死灰。
她十三岁入宫，被立为皇后正是在李傕、郭汜掌权之时，那时形势凶险，她与少年刘协在危难中扶持相守，只想着做个贤德皇后，辅助刘协中兴汉室。可是在随后的大乱中，她因将饭食让给刘协而虚弱生病，却被刘协抛弃在霸陵，又被乱兵包围，意图侮辱，那是她一生中最惶恐最无助最绝望的时候，那时候她才感受到自己才是一个十五岁的少女，甚至后来不知多少次夜里她都被那场噩梦惊醒，浑身发冷。
而危急关头张辽的出现，成为她这一生最触动的时刻，这也是她与张辽接触不多，却无法控制的生出了思慕之情的缘故，或许对张辽而言，她只是个小姑娘而已。
如果霸陵之事对她与刘协是一个裂隙的话，那随后刘协莫名其妙的疏远，那些忘恩负义的行为，让曾经相濡以沫的感情在两人之间渐渐淡漠，只剩下名分。
实际上她心中一直对刘协是有愧的，对张辽的感情无法控制，对刘协的愧疚也难以消除，她的心中始终充满了痛苦和煎熬，所以一病数月，几乎香消玉殒。后来张辽派貂蝉送来密信，令她心中欢喜，加上左慈用药，病体渐愈。即便在此事之后，她也只是暗自喜欢，并无他想。
她是皇后，注定了一生都留在宫禁之中，她从来不贪恋后位，只想着淡淡的在宫中过完一生，或是某一日缘相思而病死，而绝不逾矩。
也正因为对刘协心怀愧疚，所以她明知董贵人或是董承下药害她，却没有告知刘协，因为如今董贵人怀了刘协的龙种，这是汉家血脉的延续，是她现在做不到的。她与刘协感情消亡，希望董贵人能够代她与天子相守。
但直到如今，直到眼前刘协说出如此言语，伏寿才知道，那个曾经战战兢兢、聪慧善良的少年早已消失，或许聪慧犹在，但善良……呵呵，如此恶毒的污蔑，只让她看到了被权力腐蚀后的扭曲。
天家无情，或许大多的天子最终都会如此罢，在朝堂的勾心斗角和权力争夺中渐渐失去纯真，成为孤家寡人，无情寡恩，唯我独尊。
而更多的天子则会被不断蒙蔽，因为有太多贪慕权力的小人围在天子身边，谗言围困，三人成虎，没有坚定的心境和老道的权谋，只会行昏聩可叹之举，在伏寿看来，刘协着手对付张辽，就是一步步在走向灭亡，因为她知道张辽真的很厉害，而刘协还是太稚嫩了，偏偏刘协看不到这一点，被董承等奸臣蛊惑，加上曾经在董卓和李傕时期的压抑，一朝能够释放出来，就失去了理智。
而且伏寿此时真的看出来了，刘协就是认定了她与张辽有私，或许是因为张辽平时行事太有分寸了，刘协找不出多少罪名，只能千方百计强加罢，这是要牺牲自己了。
如此情形，她再辩驳也是无用，想到这一点，伏寿心中的愤怒反而消失，面容转为平静，看着刘协，淡淡一笑：“陛下为人君，大将军不过臣子，难道陛下自认尚不如臣子乎？连皇后也要跟随大将军……呵呵，如今陛下非要给妾身强加罪名，自求侮辱，遗笑天下，妾身不能阻止，那妾身便与大将军有私，。”
“贱人！”伏寿这般平静的姿态反而令刘协更加暴怒，大骂一声：“与张辽有私，更要害朕！”
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