第七十四章：逝世
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真的婆了。
她已经油尽灯枯了，耗不起了，也计较不动了。
她不想拖累着锦朝一起跟着她受苦.她也不想让锦荣一直听信于顾和宋妙华。
她更不想，活着还要忍受顾德昭的冷漠和猜疑。
纪氏最后深吸了一口气，慢慢抬手把脸上的泪痕擦干，然后摸索到了床角。
这个夜晚刮着风，半夜又下起大雨，快天明的时候才渐渐停下来。
锦朝睡得很沉，一点都没有被雨声吵醒，她是被青蒲叫醒的。她睁开眼的时候还很迷糊，只听到外面偶有淅淅沥沥的雨声，榻扇外还黑沉沉的，天都没有亮。
锦朝好久才醒过来，睡意朦胧地问青蒲：“什么时辰了？”青蒲却急得要哭起来：“大小姐，您快些起来，这真是急事，您起来再说”.外面采芙捧着一件水青色鹤望兰的襟裙进来，白芸又捧着铜盆。身后是一脸苍白的墨玉。
锦朝看到墨玉也来了，有些疑惑：“怎么墨玉姑娘来了，是母亲要找我吗？”墨玉摇了摇头，神情凝重：“大小姐，您快些去斜霄院吧夫人逝了！”天色刚明，还有些模糊不清。
锦朝带着几个丫头到了斜霄院，她脸上什么表情都没有。
斜霄院庑廊下，徐妈妈正等着顾锦朝过来。
她的眼眶红肿，一出声便是重重的鼻音：“大小姐，您过来了。”锦朝看着她，听到自己十分冷静地问：“徐妈妈，母亲在哪儿？可是昨晚病亡的？”徐妈妈深吸了口气，低声道“您先过来看看。，.她转身往内室里走。
锦朝跟着进了内室，她看到纪氏的尸首之后也愣住了，眼睛睁得老大。
床头纪氏的尸首，被一根腰带勒着脖子吊在雕hua的红漆床柱上，头歪着，身体扭曲，浑身都是惨白的。
母亲不是病死的，是自缢而死！她竟然是这样自缢的！
锦朝觉得自己似乎喘不过气，胸口被什么东西憋闷着，难受得她忍不住浑身发抖！
她张开了嘴要说什么，却又茫然下来，她伸了伸手，一把抓住了徐妈妈的衣袖：“徐妈妈，母亲死了她真的死了，.她喃喃地说。
徐妈妈从来没见过顾锦朝这个样子，眼眶一红，反手握住她：“大小姐，您夫人她”刚才来的路上，她心里还有一种十分不真实的错觉，母亲怎么可能就这样死了呢？她甚至还觉得是不是她做了一个噩梦，梦到墨玉和自己说母亲死了。
她是真的死了，母亲不管她了，也不管锦荣了！她真的活累了，竟然这样死了！
锦朝终于忍不住嚎啕大哭出来，她像孩子一样紧紧地揪着徐妈妈的袖子，身子似乎支撑不住般往下坐去，哭得要喘不过气来。
母亲为什么要这样死？她满心想母亲好好活着，她还为母亲请了萧先生，为什么母亲都不等到萧先生来。为什么她对母亲这么好，她还是伤心绝望到自缢了！
母亲这样死了，谁来帮她结好看的络子。谁来为她打金丝髻头面，谁来抱着她，疼爱地喊着我的朝姐儿。谁还会无论她做了什么.
都从不说她。
昨日她拉着自己的裙角，一直看着自己，自己都走了，还要叫自己回头，她再看看。
她那个时候，肯定就没想活了！她那是要最后看看自己！
自己那个时候怎么没有发现！她怎么不好好握着母亲的手，陪她一晚上。
徐妈妈忙拉住她起来。她身体软软的，好像什么支撑她的东西都没有了一样。
她见着锦朝这样伤心，忍不住哭着道：“夫人怎么会这么想不开…这这就去了，您怎么办，大少爷怎么办！她即便是真的对老爷灰心..…...也不该、不该这样死！”顾锦朝茫然地看着徐妈妈，过了好久似乎才听懂了徐妈妈的话。
她抓住徐妈妈的手，问她：“徐妈妈，母亲昨晚是不是和您说了什么？”徐妈妈哭得泣不成声：“昨夜昨夜夫人跟奴婢说，她和老爷辩驳不成，奴婢还以为自己听错了。现在想想，定是昨日老爷和夫人说了什么，才惹得夫人这般”“大小姐，您不知道。老爷这些年一直在疏远夫人，对她误解十分深。上次大黄那事，明明是夫人被宋姨娘害了，偏偏老爷觉得是夫人闹事，说她惯会闹腾，还要拖着您一起闹腾。老爷本就一直猜是夫人害了云湘，这些又有了玉屏的说法，肯定要为了云湘和夫人撕破脸皮的…夫人遭此侮辱，肯定是觉得活不下去了。”
良陈美锦txt
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