第三十八章 帮人搞事
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老张拍了拍李德胜的后背，“你让李道长去打禅机的地方讲道谈玄，自己痛快是痛快了，可容易让道长招人嫉恨啊。要知道，道长现在去职太史局，本就艰难，此来南下，也是善心的，哪能再给他添堵呢？”
一听老张的话，李德胜也是思索了一下，觉得老张说的对。然而还是有些不甘心，慨然一叹：“唉，不能让那匹夫吃点苦头，心有不甘啊。”
“这有何难？要是自己痛快，恶心恶心他们，倒也容易。”
“噢？计将安出？”
老张眉头一挑，眼神瞬间变得猥琐，“嘿嘿，兄长不是说他们礼佛打禅机呢？这倒也好办的很，待到阔论高谈之事，总有人要吟诗作赋。兄长这时候，甩几歪诗出去，不正当其时吗？”
眼见老张浑身散出神圣的气息，李德胜连忙道：“俺素来晓得兄弟高义，人称长安及时雨。今日得了兄弟的帮衬，俺便给兄弟打下手做个脚力也好。”
“兄长言重，听我说来。”
眉眼极尽龌龊的土狗微微一笑，“我也听人说过，这‘菊月登高会’，酒也是有的，菜却没有肉食。各家都自备了食盒之类，到时候，兄长偏装作头回临场。别人拿出一叠咸竹笋，你就拿上一只鸡腿，一边吃一边学人吟诗。”
“念个甚么花样的？”
“兄长只需这般说道。”
老张嘿嘿一笑，搂着李德胜肩膀故作有道高僧的模样，“‘酒肉穿肠过，佛祖留心中’，善哉善哉，你这鸡儿，今日就度了你罢！”
听到这里，李德胜眼睛顿时泛着光亮，“好极好极，这便是污了那匹夫的心思。只是念诗还差了些，那当口，正该别人斯斯文文，我却狼吞虎咽。吃相极尽难看，若有人打问我是什么跟脚，我便高声回一句：老子卫国公侄儿！”
卧槽！牛逼啊！好脑筋！
砸场子也就罢了，还给李靖家泼了一盆脏水，简直爽到不行啊。
“兄长当真举一反三，智计过人。”
老张着实的钦佩，反应这么快的头脑，想要不达都不行啊。
李德胜嘿嘿一笑：“惭愧惭愧，不过粗鲁做派，也只多让人多言一句‘卫公子弟略有鲁莽’，还差了些许。”
卧槽这样还不够？张大象同学去平康坊狂嫖滥赌，差点被吊起来活活打死好不好。你特么……你特么简直是人才啊！
“兄弟你看，若是我再做些有辱斯文的事体，是不是会更好？”
“……”
老子觉得“酒肉穿肠过”已经很有辱斯文了，你特么觉得还不够？妈的别人好歹也是江夏地头蛇啊，你要是瞎搞小心被人扔长江喂扬子鳄啊。
“若是俺再捎带几个俏丽小娘，说谢淫词浪语，会不会……”
“兄长，只怕到时候被人轰下山去。”
“贤弟可有变通之策？”
老张连忙倒腾了两下肚子里的坏水，突然眼睛一亮，击掌道：“若是兄长带了几个小娘，倒也正好有情诗用上。”
“情诗顶个甚么用？”
“嗳，兄长莫要小瞧了这个。”老张连忙轻声道，“只这一句，抵得上千句万句，偏叫那些礼佛的掩面而走。”
“吔，端的厉害？”
“不是厉害，哪能送了兄长？”
“好，若是厉害，俺在河北掳来的那点家当，便投了兄弟这里。”
“兄长切记着，这一句，需和小娘调戏一番之后，再高声唱出。”
“快说快说，要是那匹夫当下就走，最好不过！”
老张压低了声音说道：“兄长和小娘玩耍了一番，便唱道：世间安得双全法，不负如来不负卿……”
听完这句，李德胜整个人都来了精神，搓着手激动不已：“歹毒歹毒，实在是歹毒，我若是个浮屠，岂不是个淫僧？好极好极，想那匹夫听了，定是几欲抓狂。俺这掩面无谓扫地不扫地，只消那混账吃了苦头，被人暗骂，便也是俺赚了一笔。”
突然，老张一个激灵，猛地想起来一件事情：卧槽！到时候这货被李靖叫过去打问诗是从哪儿弄来的，这肯定是瞒不过李军神啊。
想到这里，老张突然额头上冒出来一点点细汗。
李德胜关切问道：“操之，可是有甚不适？”
“没、没……”
江南土狗声音略微颤抖，心中暗道：这货河北那一屁股事情都能扛下来，连皇帝威吓都不惧，可见还是靠得住的，大家都是聪明人，应该没必要卖老子人头吧？
心中这般想着，老张抬头看了看正一脸跃跃欲试的李德胜，一颗刚刚悬起来的心，又放了回去。
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