第四十三章 拜师
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老吴忙道：“不敢不敢，我如何当得起黑兄……呃，你的师父？”
黑山老妖道：“要不是师父倾囊相授，小黑大限已到，别说幻化成人，只怕……不满师父说，你我初次相见之时我已有根蔓枯萎之象，师父晚去几日，小黑必然枯作一堆废木。”
老吴道：“言重了，李祖做《道德经》本意就是普济天下，我不过是顺应他老人家的宗旨而已。”
黑山老妖失落道：“师父竟始终不肯收我么？小黑虽然积恶颇多，但实在是因为逼不得已，当年小黑不过是一棵小小的榆树，因鹞子山上多埋尸骨，小黑受了尸气熏染渐有灵识，要想生存只得不断吸取他人血肉，到后来说不得连走兽行人也殃及池鱼，逐渐积重难返，师父是嫌弃我作孽太多么？”
老吴道：“不是……”
“那是嫌我第一次见师父时不够恭敬？”
老吴苦笑道：“我怎么会那么斤斤计较？”
“那你为什么不肯收我作弟子？”
老吴道：“若说一起研究琢磨还行，师父这两个字实在是愧不敢当，黑……你就别让我难堪了。”
“哼，你左推右拖无非还是嫌我出身卑贱，你传我《道德经》是看我可怜罢了，我居然痴心妄想要做你的徒弟，你既然看不起我，大不了我再会鹞子山上吃人去！”黑山老妖说走就走，眼里还噙着泪水，拔脚就往对面跑去。
老吴一扬手道：“诶，我不是那个意思。”
金诚武笑道：“老吴，既然人家那么有诚意，你再唧唧歪歪的就没劲了，你可别跟我说正邪不两立这样的屁话，咱们这群人里，除了人家小龙看上去像那么回事，谁也不是正道上来的。”
我嘀咕道：“扯上我干嘛？”
老吴急道：“谁这么说了？我是真的觉得不配当她师父——”说到这，老吴看着黑山老妖道，“既然你都这么说了，我再推辞倒显得矫情了，你非要屈尊的话，那我就腆着脸应一声，以后万一再有名师，你改投他门我举双手赞成。”
黑山老妖喜道：“这么说你肯答应了——师父？”
老吴只得勉勉强强应了一声，马上提心吊胆道：“你不回去吃人了吧？”
黑山老妖破涕为笑道：“不去了。”
我们都笑，除了憨厚的老吴谁都看得出黑山老妖本来就没想走，无非是使了个最蹩脚的小伎俩，但是我们都能感觉到她并没有恶意，所以谁也不说破，黑山老妖一片心思显然还是发自至诚的，只不过她这两下子手段也就能对付老吴，这个几千年没出过山的老妖精性情淳朴，其实跟乡下村姑差不多。
老吴一旦身为人师，马上循循善诱道：“小黑，你以后万万不可再心起歹念为祸他人，知道吗？”
黑山老妖道：“知道，刚才要不是念着师父的教诲，那样的人渣我就算不吸干他也要了他的狗命。”
老吴满意地点点头，问及她如何能这么快就幻化成人，黑山老妖一一备述，原来她自修行《道德经》以来，虽然法力大损，但是修为却与以前大相径庭，终于在昨天夜里变成人形，她心里念着老吴，便下山拜师来了。
金诚武托着下巴端详着黑山老妖，啧啧道：“老吴好运气，收了这么辣一个女徒弟。”
我也托起下巴微眯双眼道：“是啊，导师和女研究生之间的风流韵事罄竹难书，老吴要‘老树开花第二春了’。”
金诚武愕然道：“他有第一春吗？”
我嘿嘿一笑道：“那还用问？像他们这个物种，花花草草随便度几个就受用不尽了，老吴这样的老实头对女人才有杀伤力呢！”
金诚武：“……”
他们在那边说话，我终于腾出时间来仔细地检查着我身后的汽车，那颗子弹没打着我，说不好就在车身上穿一个洞，这车是孟姨借我的不说，这两天开下来，我总得对人家汽车负责吧？
我小心地检视摩挲着，从车窗到车身，再到轮胎，苏竞忽道：“不用找了，在这。”说着摊开手掌，在白玉似的手心里，竟赫然有一颗铜弹头……
我吃惊非小道：“你哪来的？”
“用手接住的呗。”苏竞把那弹头在手里抛了抛道：“实话说他们用的那个暗器威力真不小，比我在联邦大陆见过的任何暗器都快。”
“你竟然接得住子弹？”
苏竞把弹头随手一丢道：“这东西对付一般人还行，对上真正的高手也不过如此。”
“这么说这东西对付不了你？”
苏竞淡淡地看了我一眼，转身走开：“我是剑神，不是高手。”
“切——”我看着她背影，从车里拿出一瓶水来，仔细地浇在老吴种的苹果树下，嘴里念念有词道：“苹果mm啊苹果mm，你若有知勿忘我今日浇水之恩，日后也不求你前凸后翘也不求你风情万种，唯一求你不要自吹自擂，就像某人……”
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