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第133章 无妄之灾

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不想刚才被刘二赶跑的卖桃子的小厮正好转回来,远远看见刘二在柳树边像是小解的样子,尖起嗓子喊道:“刘二,你对着树撒尿,不像门前的黄狗吗?我听说狗撒尿是记自己地盘的,你小心着那大黄狗起来咬了你的命根子去!”

被这一吓,刘二一大泡尿没有尿出来又憋回了肚子,直憋得满脸通红。

着急忙慌地把裤子重新提起,刘二转身对着那小厮喊道:“直娘贼,你这厮今天只与我作对,看来是皮痒来讨打了!”

那小厮挎着篮子,叉着腰挺起干瘦的胸膛喊道:“来,来,来!刘二,你若是追上我,爷爷便就让你打三拳!若是追不上,今天你是我孙子!”

刘二听了这话,直气得七窍冒烟,随便把裤带一系,撒步就向小厮追去。

那小厮因为天热没生意,一篮桃子一个也没有卖出去,也是一肚皮气,正要找人消遣撒气。见刘二向自己跑来,把篮子向怀里一抱,撒腿就跑。

小厮十三四岁,灵巧得像个猴子一样,向东一拐,向西一扭,转了一个圈,又跑回到了柳树旁。刘二气喘吁吁,哪里能够追得上他?

到了大柳树下面,小厮朝着树下仔细看了看,口中道:“原来你的尿被小爷吓回去了,并没有撒得出来。你且记着,在树下撒尿的就是黄狗!以后这里湿了,就记得你,我到处给人说,是你跟那只狗在这里尿的!”

刘二弯腰大口喘气,听了这话,再也忍不住,猛地直起腰来,突然向小厮跑去。

那个小厮贼精,眼睛的余光一直紧盯着刘二,见他向自己跑来,哈哈大笑。紧紧抱住篮子,引着刘二围着大柳树转了一圈,小厮风一般地跑上云骑桥。

刘二知道追不上,只好扶着大柳树喘一口气。却不想经过了这一场折腾,跨下再也憋不住。突然间停下来,刘二只觉得裤子一热,一种无比舒爽的感觉袭来,不自觉地身子就抖了几抖。

舒服劲儿过去,湿漉漉的裤子上面带着腥臊气,直冲刘二鼻孔。那种尴尬,那种酸爽,实在是难以言说。

刘二扶着大柳树,直想大哭一场。自己到底是得罪了哪路神佛,凭白惹上这么一场灾难!天地良心,自己可是只有一条能够穿出来见人的裤子,这可如何是好?

天上落屎,莫非是真有什么好事临头?自己不识老天抬举,才落得这个教训!

刘二想着,忙抬头看天,也不知道那神仙在哪里,只管拱手拜了两拜。

这尿憋得太久,裤子的腥臊气冲天,刘二自己也都忍受不了。想来想去,只好先回到后院洗一洗。好在现在天热,不等裤子干了穿在身上也没有什么。如果别人问起来,只说是因为天热下到蔡河里洗了一洗,又有什么!

后院里静悄悄的,一个人都没有。正是最热的时候,哪个在外面乱转?

刘二鬼头鬼脑地四处看看,蹑手蹑脚地走到水井边,打了一桶水起来,直向自己的裆下倒去。清凉的井水一沾身子,刘二就不禁舒服得打个冷战。

狠狠地倒了几大桶水,刘二弯腰闻了闻,好像腥臊味不是那么重了。这才把水桶放下,走到大太阳底下,叉开双腿,想了想,撅起屁股先晒后面。

正是太阳最毒辣的时候,开始还不觉得,不大一会刘二就觉得露出皮的地方被晒得生痛。裆里湿漉漉的,被太阳一晒,热气蒸起来,那滋味实在。

不等屁股晒干,刘二便就无法忍受。直起身来,低头看看小腿露出来的地方,已经晒脱了一层皮下来。

看看太阳,刘二欲哭无泪。这要是在太阳下把裤子晒干,就怕到时自己的命根子也一起蒸熟了,这可如何是好?

站在原地想了一会,一转头,正看到柳八娘的房门。

好了,不如这样,先到那婆娘的屋里取把交椅。便就坐在她的房口,借着穿堂风把裤子吹干,胜似在这大太阳下曝晒。

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