第899节：Pariah
最新网址：m.ltxsdz.com
“为什么我感觉你变了。”玛索看着眼前的少女，内心深处一直以来的疑问脱口而出。
还记得他与她的第一次相见，那麻花辫与黑框的近视眼镜一直都是猫崽心中挥之不去的美好，但是这一次，当他接到焰与圆的时候，却发现这猫姑娘留了一头黑长直，眼镜也不见了：“你是不是……来了很久了？”
“你来了多久。”焰反问道。
“……开服之前半个月。”玛索看了看四周，再一次确认了没有人注意到这边后，猫崽干脆打开了私密频道，将这猫姑娘拖了进来。
“……你还真是幸运呢，玛索。”猫姑娘一楞，然后瘪着嘴笑道。
这个模样让玛索明白，只怕眼前的少女已经在这严酷的世界上生存了有些年了，他伸出手，将她有些冰凉的手抓住。
玛索很想说辛苦了，但是不知道为什么，只觉得辛苦二字，也只能是辜负了眼前少女的付出：“你来了……到底有多久了。”
“说起来很不可思议，但是从你我分离之后算起来……已经至少有五个百年了。”说到这里，猫姑娘笑了笑：“我已经是一个老姑娘了。”
然后在焰的叙述中，玛索了解到了焰所受到的苦难，而这一切要从自己‘死亡’开始计算，“那个时候的我，完全就是一个愚蠢的孩子，只是因为妒忌着你与明美她们的友情，骗你说有婚约，本来是想让你留下我，却不曾想过，那个时候的你和我一样，都是那么的敏感而自卑。”
“没错，我觉得对手太强大了，不敢伸出手，如今想来，真是愚蠢。”玛索紧紧的握着眼前少女的手，聆听着她的话语。
“听说你出事后，那个时候的我，内心被自责所掌控，最终如同我那个愚蠢的弟弟一样，得了抑郁症，最终死在了第三个年头的初夏，但是天无绝人之路，我和你一样，回到了过去……”
“绝对不是我们这一次，对吧。”不知道为什么，看着眼前少女脸上的笑容，玛索却想哭。
“是啊，不止是没有你，连你的存在都消失了，你的母亲有了另一个爱侣，他们生活的很美满，有了好几个大人种的孩子……那个时候的我，活在自责之中，很快的，就再一次的死去了。”说到自己死的时候，焰的脸上满是笑意，：“本来以为是因为我没有好好的珍贵这一切，上天才会之样惩罚我……但是我发现，我又回到了自己四岁的时候。”
“然后你就一次又一次的轮回在这段岁月中，对吗。”玛索可以想像，那是一段多么痛苦的日子。
“是啊，渐渐的，我学会了怎么做饭，和明美，明恩她们都成为了好朋友，然后交际圈慢慢的扩大，九叶我也认识了，甚至我也不止一次的见到过你，但是我明白，那是你，也不是你……”说到这里，焰的眼里多了一丝忧伤：“我的抑郁症一直没能变好，认识的朋友越多，获得的技艺越多，我就越想念这个夜晚，想念我们之间那愚蠢而又笨拙的舞步，想念我们联手对敌时的美好，想念我们站在城墙上共浴晨光……直到有一次，我见到了健全的你。”
“我也有健全的时候吗？”玛索笑了起来，很能想象自己从一出生开始就不是瘸腿，而是可以自由行动的模样。
“是啊，那一次，你是那么的自信而迷人，你总是对我说，让我更勇敢的面对生活，最终，在那个你的帮助下，我终于摆脱了抑郁症，开始强迫自己相信，总有一天我会再一次的见到你，因为我觉得命运与神明让我这么一次又一次的面对痛苦，是为了让我明白美好到底有多么的重要，让我不再迷惘。”
“那个我最后怎么了？”
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