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第一百四十二章 禽兽不如郑智

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郑智随着气氛也笑得不停,心中更是佩服这个童贯童相公,竟然拿自己是太监这种事情来说笑,倒是坦荡。

童贯慢慢止住笑声,开口道:“郑智,你可有趣事说与大家笑笑?”

童贯点名郑智说个笑话,郑智苦笑不得,这古人娱乐生活当真匮乏,就只有喝酒说荤笑话这点乐趣了,此时气氛正好,哪里能推迟。

“相公,末将便说一个你们都没有听过的趣事。”说荤笑话,郑智倒是真不擅长,不过怎么说也是两世为人,自然总有几个记得的。

“快说快活。”童贯手臂挥舞,满脸通红,催促郑智快说。

“说有一富户家的书生头次进青楼,恰逢一雏妓出阁,书生甚是喜欢,斥巨资而得,两人洞房花烛,少女羞涩,便往床见放了一个枕头隔开书生,说道,你今夜若是翻过了这枕头,便是禽兽。相公,你道怎样?”郑智出口,也就是这种后世烂大街的笑话,却是也能在此时显摆一番。

众人又笑,这等好事,还管什么禽兽不禽兽,钱都出了,自然大战三百回合方能罢休。

“怎样?还能怎样,枕头顶个什么事情。”童贯回答,脸上也是浅笑不止,已是残身的童贯,越是得不到这一份事情,越是喜欢这些玩笑。

“那书生听言,全身紧绷,脑中皆是圣人教诲,口中念叨着礼法教义,沉沉睡去了。”郑智说到这里也停了一下。

“哈哈……郑智这个好笑,还有这等书生,迂腐不堪,定然是读书读傻了。”童贯又是大笑,笑得几声,半杯好酒下肚。

众人也是大笑。倒是郑智心中纳闷了,这个故事,笑点不在这里啊。

郑智连忙加大声音盖过众人笑声道:“故事没完呢,还有还有……”

“哈哈……此事有趣,还有什么?书生第二天后悔要去找老鸨退钱?”童贯笑意不止,开口再问。

郑智看得众人前仰后合,停得片刻,等众人回神之后,再道:“第二日大早,书生鸡鸣而起,穿戴整齐,与这少女见礼,道,在下昨日恪守礼法,不动姑娘分毫,还望姑娘得知在下蒙圣贤教诲,非禽兽也!相公,可知少女回了一句什么话语?”

“管这少女回了一句什么话语,便是这书生,当真为当世第一大圣人,哈哈,大圣人……”童贯口中说着大圣人,却是这表情上尽是鄙夷。有些人能行,却不敢行。有些人敢行却不能行。

“那少女鄙道,公子实非禽兽,乃禽兽不如尔!”郑智说完,紧张看着众人,心中念叨着,诸位,笑点在这里啊。

说完只见众人没有一点反应,倒是让郑智急起来了。

再看众人,你看看我,我看看你。

忽然爆发哄堂大笑。

“哈哈……好一个禽兽不如,好一个禽兽不如。”童贯捂着肚子狂笑不止,随即站起身来接着大笑。

“好!郑将军这个好!”

“郑将军凭此趣事,当名传天下。”

郑智挥了一把脸上的汉,松了口气,好在他们都听懂了,这些古人真是难搞。

站起来的童贯又道:“禽兽不如原是这般来的,回京后,如此趣事当与官家说道一番,不定又赏两个侍女,哈哈……”

倒是郑智有些窘迫了,要是这故事当真名传天下……

会不会有个新绰号,禽兽不如郑智!

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