第750章 痔疮
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但这是一个表态，无语的表态。易军手中的军刀不放下，姜立坐在他身边就会六神无主。忒特妈吓人了，人家要开会好不好，你在身边拿着个刀子晃来晃去，还让不让人安心了。更何况，一双大脚丫子摆在桌子上，人家要是一坐下去，脸都被你的脚丫子给挡住了！
所以，刚刚咬了咬牙的姜立，此时再度认孬种了，老老实实退了回去。但是退在椅子后面傻站着也不好，更显得寒碜。
于是，姜立随机应变，尴尬的一笑说：“老处长，好长时间没听您老人家训话了。您讲话，我听着，跟以前一样，我在下面听。”
说着，姜立这就要跑到主席台下面，趁机找个第一排的座位坐下。虽然不坐主席台会显得很逊，但总比在那里傻站着展览要有点面子不是？
但是，易军要的就是这小子进退两难，怎么会允许他随便下去？只见易军仰着的身子往后一翘，椅子的两条后腿儿摇来摇去仿佛摇椅。而易军的头则轻轻转过来一点，皮笑肉不笑的说：“二小，我说你小子越来越了是不是？你特妈今天是主持会议的，老子讲个毛？你下去了，还做不做事了？耽误了军务，你负责还是老子负责？”
这么一顶大帽子砸过来，姜立可真的不能走下台去了。于是，像个罚站的小学生一样，老老实实但又心不甘情不愿的站在易军的身边。
而易军则语重心长的说：“二小，不是老子说你，好好做事是为了你好。真要是把这件事搞黄了，别说魅影大姐饶不了你，哪怕老子给疯子（封雨霖绰号）打个电话，疯子也得抽你屁股。对了，疯子前阵子不是得了痔疮吗，割了没有？”
噗……
底下一群人都喷了！在这个严肃而庄重的场合，怎么就问起屁股上长痔疮的事情了。偏偏还说得郑重其事，仿佛嘘寒问暖一般无比热情。而且大家都能听出来，这个所谓的“疯子”，肯定还是姜立更上一级的领导。要不然，怎么有资格打姜立的屁股呢？
姜立满头是汗，本不想在这个场合说这么粗俗的话题。但是虎王亲自发问了，而且是询问自己领导的病情，满是关怀之意，怎能不回答？于是姜立咽了口吐沫，无比艰难的说：“割……割了。”
如今，台下的杀手们都已经忍不住了，一个个低着脑袋捂着嘴。唯有几个定性高的，强忍住脸上的笑意，但心里头也已经笑得花枝乱颤。
而易军则没有丝毫笑容，认真的说：“回头告诉疯子，别看痔疮不是大病，但是疼起来真要命，一定要注意。还有，要注意屁股上的卫生，拉屎不擦干净最容易得这个病。我这是为他好，回头一定要原原本本告诉他。”
“是、是，属下一定如实转告您对封处长的问候。”姜立惨白的脸色之中，顿时浮现出一种尴尬欲死的绯红。奶奶滴堂堂虎窟二把手，封雨霖还会拉屎不擦干净？姜立甚至都在犹豫，到时候怎么“如实”转告封雨霖了。说不定封雨霖听了大恼，当即就会一脚把自己踹翻。
易军点了点头，仿佛对于自己的问候能够被转达表示满意。而后就不说话了，好像就等着姜立说话。
可是，当姜立清了清嗓子，刚说了两个字的时候，易军偏偏又开口了。这是摆明了玩儿他，让他不说话就像是发傻，而一说话就把他的话堵回去。
果然，易军仿佛忽然想起了什么，但却不是跟姜立说，而且直接问隔着一个空座的湘竹泪。于是，姜立只能再度闭嘴。今天他这张嘴开不得、闭不得，好像嘴上长了痔疮一般难受。
【作者题外话】：兄弟姐妹们，谁要是经常上微博的话，可否给俺加一加关注？狐妖会时不时在上面发一点小感慨、小动态，哇咔咔！对了，俺的新浪微博名字叫做“青狐妖本尊”。
谁要是关注俺，谁今天就能交个桃花运，嗯哼……
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