第一百八十九章 【溜须拍马】(下)
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七七缓步来到他身边,用肩膀扛了他一下:“你不用害怕,有我帮你,没人敢拿你怎么样。”声音突然又低了下去:“不过你得老老实实告诉我,你是怎么杀死文雅他们的。”说话的时候眼睛里面流露出期待而兴奋的光芒。
胡小天暗骂七七变态,既然她认准了事情是自己干得,不妨破罐子破摔,好好吓吓她,看了看周围,确信无人,方才向她勾了勾手指,七七将耳朵凑到他的唇边。
胡小天压低声音道:“先奸后杀!一个不留!”
七七惊诧地捂住了嘴巴,一双美眸流露出异样的神采,显得兴奋至极,但是这其中绝没有一丝一毫的恐惧:“你……你居然……连太监也不放过?”
胡小天阴测测笑道:“我做事从来斩草除根,片甲不留……”话没说完眼前拳影一晃,右眼剧痛,却是挨了七七狠狠一拳,胡小天居然没能反应过来,被近距离击中,脑袋极其夸张地倒向身后。
七七咬牙切齿道:“死太监,你当本公主是白痴?你是太监嗳,先奸后杀,你有那个本事吗?”
胡小天直起身来:“是你逼……”
蓬!又是一拳问候在胡小天的左眼上,胡小天这次直挺挺倒在了地上,他若是想躲当然能够轻松躲过,可他对七七的性情非常了解,如果不让她在手足上占到一点小便宜,只怕这妮子不会善罢甘休,顺水推舟,老子权且吃个小亏,你姥姥的,老子有没有那个本事?终有一天你会知道……呃……人家还是个小姑娘,胡小天啊胡小天,做人任何时候不能忘记道德二字……
龙烨霖这一夜睡得安稳,清晨醒来感觉身体恢复了许多,舒展双臂,从床上坐起身来,感觉腹内鸣响,崩!的一声放了一个响屁♀个屁将一旁的太监宫女惊了一跳,旋即又惊喜不已,一名太监脱口道:“皇上放屁了……皇上……”说完之后方才意识到自己说错了话,吓得扑通一声跪在地上,反手打了自己两个大嘴巴子:“皇上,奴才言行无状,罪该万死。”
好在龙烨霖此时心情不错并没有追究他的罪责,其实这小太监并没有说错话,他的确是放了个屁,而且动静很大,所有人都听到了。
胡小天在外面苦熬了一夜,这会儿刚刚进入宣微宫,刚好听到龙烨霖的这个响屁,内心也是为之一松,虽然阑尾炎对他来说只是一个小得不能再小的手术,可患者是皇上,任何事情都需要小心谨慎,放屁就意味着皇上可以进食了,可以说手术绝无问题。
胡小天第一时间来到床前,喜气洋洋道:“恭喜皇上,贺喜皇上。”
龙烨霖有些哭笑不得,放个屁而已,何喜之有?他干咳了一声道:“何喜之有?”
胡小天道:“吃道:龙气升腾,四海平安,小天得闻皇上的龙气,实乃三生有幸,内心激荡久久不能平复,古人有云:大音希声,大象希形。此气只能天上有,人间难得几回闻。皇上德馨万民,威震四方,得沐皇上的祥瑞之气,我等是何其幸运,除了皇上谁又能发出如此空灵悠远的声音,谁又能散发出可比芝兰的香气,让我等有三月不知肉味,余音穿梁而三日不绝的感受。”
周围一帮太监宫女听得瞠目结舌,见过不要脸的可从来没见过那么不要脸的,不就是一个屁吗?哪还有那么多的讲究,还龙气?还祥瑞?拍马屁的见多了,可拍马屁这么肉麻的还是第一次见到。
龙烨霖干咳了一声,他也觉得胡小天的这通马屁拍得有些过了,不过听起来还是感到舒服受用,比刚刚那个小太监直接喊皇上放屁了要顺耳许多,正所谓千穿万穿,马屁不穿,皇上也不能免俗。
胡小天拍完这通马屁居然脸不红心不跳,笑眯眯望着龙烨霖道:“陛下现在感觉如何?”
龙烨霖道:“朕放了这个……”总觉得说屁字不雅,当不起自己大康天子的身份,斟酌了一下方道:“朕放了这股龙气之后,感觉舒爽了许多,伤口有些发紧,但是不疼了。”
胡小天笑道:“皇上洪福齐天实乃大康社稷之福。”
龙烨霖道:“朕有些饿了!”
胡小天道:“陛下放心,现在可以用膳了。”
那帮太监前去准备膳食的时候,龙烨霖向胡小天点了点头道:“胡小天,这次你救驾有功,朕重重有赏。”
胡小天慌忙跪倒在地上听赏。
龙烨霖说到关键之处却突然中断,胡小天等了半天不见他说话,禁不住偷偷向上瞄,却见龙烨霖抿嘴闭眼,崩!的又是一个屁放了出来c可谓是臭气熏天,胡小天离得太近,避无可避只能忍气吞声默默承受了这个臭屁,刚刚大喊皇上放屁的那个小太监此时总算找到了将功赎罪的机会,扑通一声跪了下来,兴高采烈道:“恭喜皇上,贺喜皇上,皇上龙气升腾,四海平安,小筝子得闻皇上的龙气,何其幸运……”这货也算得上是过耳不忘,竟然将胡小天刚刚拍马屁的那番话一字不落地复述出来。
!q
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