607 摆谱
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刘老爷子所谓的‘自己吃面条’，到底只是气话，他当然还是放不下张劲那堪称独步的美食。而且，其实他早有所料，那边不可能真的忍心让自己一个没人帮衬的老头儿，可怜兮兮的每天就是面条当饭！
毕竟，那一边的张劲与自己，虽然天天斗嘴不断，一见面就跟仇家路窄，刀光剑影，攻讦不休。但是，这段时间朝夕相处，培养起的感情绝对不浅。这小子嘴里说的凶，却绝对是刀子嘴豆腐心，肯定看不得自己吃苦。
而小楼中的何家三口子，一个个的也都是心软面善的主儿。就算是那个何榴莲，也是冷面热心。就算是现在似乎性格变化很大，一副痞里痞气的样子，但他的道德底线在那里，也绝对不可能任由自己‘孤苦伶仃’！
所以，刘老爷子虽然一副‘不蒸馒头争口气’的德行，气呼呼的回到自己家，但是他心里可是笃定的很。回家后更是根本没有开伙煮面条的意思，老神在在的坐在家中，看着电视等着电话！
虽然灶上用大锅烧着水，但那是给人看的。如果张劲那小子有良心，亲自来请的话，就让他看看，‘咱老刘可不是来虚的，真的打算煮面条了哦！’
而且，刘老爷子拿定主意，自己也学一把诸葛亮，摆摆谱。如果那边不是很有诚意的请个三五趟，自己绝对不去！
这样的话，再碰到何榴莲的毒舌嘲讽，刘老爷子也可以很趾高气昂、很得瑟的说：
“本来我是不想来的，可是你们三番五次的请我，我才来的！”
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刘老爷子算盘打得精，而事实果真也像是他所预料的那样。先是何家小姑娘的电话，然后是何榴莲的老婆。在他连续两次‘坚拒’之后不久，张劲的电话也来了。
“小劲啊，你就甭劝我了，你家有不讲理的大人物在，而且你这个当主人的都跟他穿一条裤子。老刘我势单力孤，可不敢去吃，吃一肚子气不说，还要被赶出门来，太丢人了。
再说，我这面条已经准备下锅了，虽然我老刘厨艺不精，煮出来的面条味道估计比猪食强不到哪儿去，但是老刘我宁可捏着鼻子吃自己煮的面条，也不愿意去你那儿受气！”
刘老爷子口气中满是不忿，描绘着自己如今的‘惨况’更是不遗余力，拐弯抹角的‘求安慰、求恳请’！
然而，与刘老爷子相处日久的张劲，显然知道刘老爷子是什么矫情德行，那绝对是头牵着不走打着倒退的老驴。
张劲清楚的知道，如果自己真的软声相求，虽然最终这老头儿肯定会得意洋洋的回到饭桌上来。但是，以这老头儿的操性脾气，尾巴肯定得翘到半天高，而且连着几个月，在自己面前都会得意洋洋，阴阳怪气的拿小话点自己。
那接下来的日子，自己可就有得受了，何爸爸估计也好受不了。
预想到后果的张劲，当然不会自己用绳子围个圈，把脑袋往里送。想要让这老头儿乖乖的用劳动换饭吃，还是要讲究策略的。
所以，当刘老爷子满怀期待的等着张劲的安慰，等着张劲的软语相求的时候，张劲只是故作沉吟了一下后，利索的说：
“哦！原来是这样啊。那好吧，既然这样的话，我们就自己开动了，不打扰你吃面条了！就到这里，那我先挂电话了？”
“啊？”
张劲的回答，顿时让刘老爷子傻了眼，一声脱口而出的‘啊’字，调门足足比往常高了八度。
这完全和他老人家预想的套路不同啊？这要是真的电话挂断了，那中午真就只能下面条吃了！
可关键的是，自己已经早就习惯于每天去张劲那儿吃，家里别说一根面条都没有，就算是米面都没有一颗，难道等着饿肚子？
听到话筒那边刘老爷子惊讶的‘啊’声，张劲仿佛看到了刘老爷子坐蜡的窘态，憋着笑问道：
“我说老刘头儿，你‘啊’啥？还有事儿？有事儿快说，我还要吃饭呢，早就饿了！”
发现张劲并没有立即挂电话，听到话筒那边张劲憋着笑的声音。同张劲‘斗争’日久的刘老爷子，直到此时，才终于敏锐的察觉到，自己想玩‘欲擒故纵’的小心思应该是被这个家伙戳穿了。
张劲这小子本来就猴精猴精的，尤其是跟自己相斗这么久了，显然把自己的脾气摸的门儿清。不是有人说嘛，最了解自己的，永远是敌人！
.!q-
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