608 餐桌上的战争
最新网址：m.ltxsdz.com
午宴，终于开席！
只不过席间的气氛很有些怪异，往常欢笑、打屁声不断的餐桌，一片沉闷。
何妈妈专心的喂何爸爸一口一口的吃饭，心无旁骛。躺在轮床上何爸爸一边张口接过何妈妈喂过来的饭菜，细嚼慢咽，一边用带着戏谑笑意的眼神猛劲的在刘老爷子身上、脸上转悠；
而何清浅和张劲俩人，也如何妈妈何爸爸一样，一个喂一个吃。但是两人都是满脸的有趣笑容，眼神更是不老实的在何爸爸与刘老爷子之间逡巡往复。
这对小情侣，都属于腹黑型人物，典型唯恐天下不乱，这是在等着看热闹呢！
至于刘老爷子，则是低眉沉目，两只老眼盯着手里的饭碗，除了偶尔伸筷子时，瞄准一下菜盘子之外，眼神儿根本不敢乱飘。但即使如此，他也能感受到数道不时落到自己身上的目光，烤的他身子发热，如坐针毡。
你说我这么馋干嘛？乖乖的躲在家里多好，果然被笑话了，果然还不如在家里吃面条呢！
刘老爷子心里流泪，全是懊悔！
这种怪异的，暗流涌动的气氛，一直持续了十来分钟，终于一向耐性不好的刘老爷子受不了这种视线的灼烤，爆发了。
先是将手里的饭碗重重在桌上一顿后，气呼呼的对桌子上的其他人喝到：
“何榴莲看着我干嘛？还让不让人吃饭了？你这是想给我下马威是么？别忘了，可是你们三番五次的求我，我在盛情难却之下回来的。怎么，把我请过来后，现在又打算赶我下桌，赶我出门？”
刘老爷子的突然发飙，在让张劲与何清浅吓了一跳之后，眼神中纷纷泛起‘有趣’的目光
等候许久的‘节目’终于上演了！
于是，在刘老爷子率先宣战后，两人不约而同的将目光从刘老爷子身上，转移到擂台的另一位选手何爸爸的身上！想看着何爸爸如何应对！
果然，何爸爸没有让自己的女儿和准女婿失望，暂时停止了吃饭的进程，开口就展现出如黑曼巴般深邃而有力的毒舌。
“请你？盛情难却？
我说老流氓，你这是往你脸上贴金啊！我们不过就是看你老胳膊老腿儿的，没啥自理能力，怕你饿死。怜悯一下，想赏你口饭吃，你还真以为自己是上门的贵客了？
……”
刘老爷子：
“我是不是贵客，用不着你何榴莲操心。别忘了，现在你家闺女还没嫁给小劲，她还不是这里的女主人！你现在也不是小劲的老丈杆子，到这儿也就是客居，论起亲近，你还不如我这个邻居！”
何爸爸：
“那又怎么样？就是因为我家清浅还没嫁给小张，我才更有话语权。等嫁了之后才叫难说？不信你问问小张，现在他敢不听我的话么？”
……
刘老爷子与何爸爸的交锋，让张劲与何清浅目不暇接，对于二老扯到自己身上的话题充耳未闻，干脆暂时也停下吃饭，专心观战。
何爸爸到底是国学大师，本就口才便给，再加上这近一年时间的电视教育，更是让何爸爸的辩论水平更上层楼。能如大家一般旁征博引，也能如街头泼妇一样，撒泼耍赖，堪称雅俗共赏！
在何爸爸强大的战斗力下，不过大战几十回合，何爸爸就牢牢的压制住了刘老爷子，让这老头儿无论如何腾挪努力，却始终无法搬回局面。
很快，理屈词穷的刘老爷子，不得不败退下来。
不过，刘老爷子倒也没有很没风度的摔碗离开。正相反，这个气呼呼的老头重新端起了饭碗，撇着嘴道出了‘败者感言’。
“老刘我吃饭，懒着理你这个又臭又硬还带刺儿的何榴莲。
反正你这臭穷酸看咱老刘不顺眼也不是一天两天一年两年了！这么多年下来，你咬掉了咱一块肉么？
咱是流氓，罔顾人伦的文流氓，不跟你腐儒斗嘴！”
见刘老爷子将话题重新带回几年前两人的隔空骂战中，何爸爸却没有激动。更没有‘宜将剩勇追穷寇’的对刘老爷子穷追猛打，反而原本脸上的嘲讽也消散去，变回一脸平静。
.!q-
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