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第34节

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更多小说ltxsba.com日期:2006-9-600:55:30

小新一句惊世骇俗的"假冒伪劣"让由飞重振男士雄风,他谄媚般地冲小新欠欠身,巴结的表情溢于言表:"小新,哪天你结婚我一定给你送份儿大礼!"

韩冬俨然一副小新老公的神态:"你准备送啥样的大礼啊?"

郝五自知刚才说错了话,如梦方醒,抢着说:"由飞的大礼那一定比火车头还大!"

由飞拿郝五没办法,他一会儿白眼珠子多一会儿黑眼珠子多,跟憋了尿似的笑不得也哭不得.

郝五接着弥补过错,向韩冬敬酒:"等你跟小新结婚那天我也得给你们送份厚礼!"又转头看着我跟老k:"别着急,我也给你俩弄一份儿!"

我跟老k面面相觑,我冲郝五做了一个最标准的辱骂姿势――在确定他没有看到情况下.

小新拍拍我的腿,轻咳一声:"我们结婚还早着那,没谱儿的事儿,诶,咱得分清主次啊,今儿可是由飞的大喜日子,咱得都多敬由飞两杯!"

"就是."老k顺过小新的话:"说不定人由飞这辈子就结这么一次婚,容易嘛!"

由飞很不平:"怎么说的我跟个婚贩子一样!"

我说:"你丫要是婚贩子还真好了呢,就苦了被你残害的无辜少女了."

"谁残害谁呀?"由飞语气里有无限的委屈:"没听说过吗,这是一个把男人当狗当猪当牲畜的年代,男人地位已不比当年啦!"

"这话也太没品了!"刘晴发表观点:"你们男人再怎么喊冤,也照样比我们女人有优势,咱别的不说,就说这个内急吧,你们的生理结构就注定了你们解决内急的时候要比我们女人方便,随便一站拉链一拉,就可以速战速决,不用下蹲不用露臀还没什么尴尬.丫我在来的路上还碰到一个呢,都不带遮掩的!"

"可不是嘛!"张婷一听有关男人生理的问题她就来劲:"我觉得你们其实也挺伟大,你看看,一来不影响交通,二来可以解急,还顺带地灌溉地上的花花草草,义务绿化城市,

撒个尿都比我们有公德心,多高尚啊!"

郝五一听有人夸男人高尚,又发起了彪:"那是,城市就是我们男人绿化的,历史就是我们男人创造的,我们男人的口号就是――只要不害臊,处处能撒尿!"

看着郝五还在那儿眉飞色舞,老k由飞韩冬那脸就跟被仙人掌刺了一样肿的通红,我们几个女同胞笑的比花儿都灿烂.

由飞结婚,那由飞就是被灌酒的那个.

我们这一桌儿人都是劝酒高手,几个回合下来任由飞酒量再好也差不多醉了个七八分.他眼一直,讲话就不受大脑控制:"在坐的诸位,我从今天起可就正式进入坟墓了,你们得多给我准备点儿纸钱."

"行!"刘晴很干脆:"我用镀过金的纸给你做纸钱!"

由飞一撂筷子:"你丫不是浪费吗!普通的冥纸就成,我对钱从来没有种族歧视!"

毕竟晚上由飞还得洞房花烛,所以我们一看他喝高了也就很有默契的停止劝酒.谁知道由飞这孙子得了便宜还卖乖,说什么也要小新接受他的三杯敬酒.我知道小新不会喝白酒,想起身替她代喝,结果由飞死活不乐意,张婷他们又在旁边起哄,小新势单力薄,只能就范.

第一杯酒下去,小新眉皱了;第二杯酒下去,小新脸红了;第三酒下去,小新腿软了.

"还行吗?"我小声问她.

小新摸摸脸:"感觉好热哦,茅台好难喝."

"呵呵,多少人想喝都喝不到呢."我给她倒上茶:"喝点茶,吃点菜,压一压."

由飞捡着软柿子捏,踩着鼻子上脸:"小新乃女中豪杰!我再敬一杯!"

小新摇摇头:"不行不行,我不会喝白酒,现在已经晕了."

"那刚才不是你喝啊?弄半天你还没喝啊!不行,你必须得喝我的敬酒,今儿我真的很感激你.来,咱俩一块把它喝了!"

由飞说的声色俱全,小新被感动了:"咱可说好了,这是最后一次!"说着仰脖儿就是一杯.

由飞不依不挠的接着缠小新,我看小新那眼睛马上就要发直,把心一横,豁出去了,冲老k使个眼色,咱闹吧!

老k是个好搭档,不管是参加同学婚礼还是庆祝朋友生日,我们俩就是闹场的,经过多次试验配合,我们在这种场合已经有了炉火纯青的默契.有时候我也会琢磨,老k是个好男人,如果没有小新我有那么一点可能会爱上他的,可这世界上没有如果不是,所以我只能扼腕叹息一回,这辈子只能给他当哥们儿了.

婚礼不就图个热闹吗,我左手拿酒杯右手拿茶杯挨个儿的给他们敬酒,嘴里喝了酒杯里的酒再偷偷的往茶杯里吐,然后悄悄的把茶杯里的水往桌子底下倒.我看韩冬时不时就瞅小新一眼,心里发恨,他看一眼我敬他一杯酒,韩冬哪能经的住这般折腾,一会儿那脸就跟马路上的红灯一样醒目了.

老k是酒场上的老将,没多大功夫就把刘晴郝五几个给灌挺了,而他自己却还毫发无伤,我看由飞还在那儿缠小新,嘴一邪:该你了!我千娇百媚的晃到由飞身边,使出浑身解数往他嘴里灌酒,心里祈祷今晚你要洞房不了可别怪我.

"飞子",我第n次给由飞到上酒:"为了表达我对你忠心的第8次祝福,咱再干一杯!!"

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