第四章 国殇 （七 上）
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这种目光让李旭很受伤，仿佛一瞬间就在他和李婉儿、李世民姐弟之间隔开了堵厚厚的墙。没有高墙的时候，大家可以像朋友般肆无忌惮谈笑玩闹。有墙的存在，立刻让人想起彼此之间的地位差距原来是那样的大。
“只有将校才有资格上场，你又不是不知道！”张秀对着李旭的背影气哼哼地嘀咕。他不明白表弟突然间生哪门子气，不就是不会打球么，有谁天生会打来。哪个能下场的，没在球杖上花过七、八月的功夫！
他佩服表弟骑术精良，以为表弟稍为学习后，下场击鞠便可以百战百胜。偏偏忘记了在离开易县前，自己这个表弟骑的是匹青花骡子。一个家中连好马都备不起的人，怎么有空闲和钱财来玩击鞠？
李旭不理睬张秀的抱怨，骑着马慢慢走向军营。今天所有的好心情被张秀一句话给破坏了，他现在只想回帐篷里去蒙头睡上一觉。可无论马跑得多快，李婉儿在球场外的呐喊声还是缠绕在耳边，怎么都挥之不去。
李旭不知道自己是不是有些喜欢李婉儿，只知道自己绝对不可以对李家二小姐动半分心思。双方彼此之间家世相差太大，况且婉儿已经与柴家有了婚约在先。
旭子还小，他还不清楚，即便没有那个该死的婚约在，二人的性子也格格不入。此时的他虽然已经开始长大，却没长大到足够明白男女之间的事。每个人都有他自己的成长环境，就像一只鸟和一尾鱼，彼此之间可能充满好奇，但无论任何一方走进对方的天地，都不会得到想要的结局。
“如果我能当大将军……”有时候，李旭激动地想。但他的梦很快就被自己用冷水泼醒。已经不是在易县时那个脑袋里充满不切实际梦想的少年，他觉得自己长大了，已经知道了人和人生下来彼此之间就存在差距。‘功名但凭马上取’，这句话乍听起来让人热血，但辽东血战让他知道，一万人个普通人家的子弟中，未必有一个能活着达成自己的梦想。而那些世家子弟，他们的功劳自有别人的尸体来堆积。
“即使成了大将军后又能怎样，我来她的心思都猜不透！”李旭苦笑，伸手拍了一下自己的后脑勺。年少的梦就是一个梦，不会有任何变成事实的可能。李婉儿也许对自己很好，喜欢和自己一起玩，希望听自己讲塞外那些稀奇古怪的故事。但她对别人也一样好，在刘弘基、王元通等人面前，一样像个小妹妹。
“也许，她走到我身边，仅仅只是因为好奇！”李旭笑着自我安慰，嘴里突然感到有些苦，有股酸涩的滋味从心头一直涌上眉梢，涌到眼底。
“呜－呜－呜！”四野里突然响起了号角声，彻底打断了他的心事。‘唐公聚将议事！’李旭稍微楞了一下，立刻意识到角声来自护粮军中。这可是很久不曾发生的事情，他用力一夹马肚子，风驰电掣般冲入了军营。
注1：古礼，女子出嫁后，如果非娘家派人来接，不得主动回家。
注2：击鞠，古代马球。起源年代不详，唐代最为盛行。比赛双方各为十人，以攻门进球为胜。因为有利于骑兵配合，所以在尚武的隋唐两代，皇家、贵族和富豪之间非常流行。至今有唐代以击鞠为背景的铜镜花纹流传下来。
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