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第八十四章 治丧委员会

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胖子说:“咋能捏,你丝(是)齐王你忘咧?”

我到是没忘,那我跟国家说去,就说秦始皇把山东封给我了,看能不能让我干个省委书记啥的?要不先来个临市长?我估计国家可能不让……

我见五人组里最细心的和鬼点子最多的李师师和刘邦不在,索性把报纸一收说:“今天先休息,咱们明天再从长计议吧。”

我端了杯茶点了根烟溜达进包子她们那个家,像个懒汉一样瘫进沙发,一下把两个女人都挤出半米远,我伸着懒腰问:“刘还没自杀?”

李师师奇怪道:“刘为什么要自杀?”

我说:“祝四萍就是他杀的,然后他为了谢罪就死在祝四萍她们家了。”李师师皱眉说:“不要告诉我结果!”

“就说,最后那个模特跑了,你们家印小天芶延残喘地活着就完了——这是好几年以前的片子了。”我说着话,手习惯性地搂住了包子的腰,包子像小猫一样靠了过来。

李师师忽然说:“这么说表嫂你早就看过了?”

包子说:“是呀。”

“那你还看?”

“你不是爱看吗,我陪着你。”

我跟李师师说:“印小天不是你嫂子喜欢的类型,她喜欢大为。”

李师师眼睛发亮,转过头来刚想说什么,就看见我们亲密地抱在一起,她脸腾一下红了。找了个借口就跑了出去。

包子看了她背影一眼说:“表妹一点也不像个模特。”

我的手开始在她身上游走,问:“那模特应该什么样。一个一个像小骚狐狸一样?”

包子使劲瞟我一眼说:“你能不能把你说话那股口气改改?奔三的人了还像个小流氓一样。”

我说:“当初你不就因为这个喜欢我的吗?难道是因为我扶老太太过马路爱上我的?”

包子靠在我怀里回忆说:“第一次见你,认都不认识你,你就像个流氓一样坐在我对面,要跟老娘玩一个游戏。”

我说:“咱们能不能把那个‘像流氓一样’的修饰语去掉?”

“你把一个硬币夹在手指里然后问老娘问题,还让我每次回答问题前先把硬币拿出来,然后你就问了我两个特别无聊的问题,第三个问题你问我‘第一次做爱跟男朋友说了什么’。你小子阴我,把硬币夹得那么紧,老娘就中了你地计,说‘怎么拔不出来呀’,一说完我就知道上当了,我心说今儿既然碰上流氓了,再绷着也不合适了,就跟你说了句不太含蓄的话。”

我接口说:“你那是不太含蓄吗,你跟我说操你妈——”

包子呵呵呵地笑起来,小心地往门口看了一眼。道:“狗东西你还记上仇了,我那不是气急了吗?”

我抱着包子,感慨道:“说起来咱俩认识地过程也挺浪漫的,不比霸王别姬差啊。”

包子说:“对了,明天我爸叫你去吃个饭,我下午5一回来咱就走。”

我紧张地说:“去干什么?”

包子不满地说:“你慌什么,不就是吃个饭嘛。”

我说:“除了吃饭能说结婚的事不?”

包子横着我说:“那你是怎么个意思,想结不想结?”

“不想结。”

“你再说一遍。”

“……想结。”

包子这才转嗔为喜。

我说:“你爸准备跟我要多少财礼钱?”

“他漫天要价你坐地还钱。难道他要多少你给多少?”

我晕头转向地说:“这难道就是传说中的女生外向,我说你到底是哪头的呀?”

包子抽我一个小巴掌说:“少得了便宜卖乖,主要是我也老大不小的了,其实我爸刁难刁难你也就是为了人前露露脸,他要钱做什么,还不是都贴给了我?”包子忽然想了什么似的说,“我爸虽然知道你是个什么德行。但你明天千万收敛着,别跟个二杆子似地。”

我说:“我再怎么说也是个经理,到是你得小心,别说话没着没沿的,你爹还以为我把你带坏了呢。”

包子妩媚地看我一眼,说了一句话:“跟你睡了两年,你难道还不了解老娘的为人?”

我:“……”

包子她爸要有良知就不该跟我要财礼钱,要知道我在认识包子以前也就是不着调了一点,说话注意着呢,自从跟她睡了这两年。嘴上没了把门的,什么都往出冒。

明天,无论如何得把项羽推到第一线上去让他和张冰见面,然后去和项老会计拼个刺刀见红,总之明天一天我都得和姓项的周旋到底了。

[记住网址龙腾小说ltxsba.com]

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