第1章 碰瓷儿新姿势
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到站了吗？潘小闲迷迷糊糊的睁开了眼睛，他感觉自己的眼皮仿佛重如泰山，吃奶的劲儿都使出来了才把眼睛睁开一条缝，眼前的一切都好像加了特效，不管看什么都似是蒙了一层薄薄的红纱。更多小说ltxsba.com
明明上车之前还活力四射，为什么睡了一觉反而累得跟死狗似的？
潘小闲手扶着前面座椅的靠背站起身来，这个平时非常简单的动作，此时却好似艰难百倍。
身体就好像是缺少润滑的废旧机器，关节动起来涩涩的，平时挺机灵的脑子这会儿也好像变成了糨糊，潘小闲想了好一会儿都没能想明白自己怎么就会变成这样了。
横穿马路被高空抛物砸到头也就罢了，可我特么在公车上睡觉招谁惹谁了？
“下不下？下不下？下不下？”公交司机很不耐烦的把重要的事情说了三遍。
“我……”以潘小闲平时那嘴皮子的利索劲儿非得跟公交司机好好说道说道不可：你什么态度！
可是现在潘小闲感觉自己的舌头好像变得又粗又大又硬，说话根本赶不上趟，只听“吱”的一声车门关闭，潘小闲连忙把千言万语凝聚成了一个字：“……下！”
“呯——”
电动车门再次开启，公交司机用杀人的目光看着这个年轻人就跟七八十岁老太太似的一步一挪、颤颤巍巍的从最后排走向车头，这小子是故意的吧？这绝逼是故意的吧？
潘小闲此时真是有苦说不出，他也不知道自己怎么了，每一步都是无比的沉重，就好像双腿灌满了铅。
不！这哪里是双腿灌满铅啊，这简直就是浑身都灌满了铅！连汗毛都是铁打的！
明明就只是喝了一听可乐，为什么就好像醉酒了一样脚步虚浮、晃晃悠悠？
据说每升可乐的酒精含量只有十毫克，就我这水平……基本也就告别啤酒了吧？
“噗通——”
潘小闲就好像是被放倒的大树一样，直挺挺的正面拍在了冰冷坚硬的柏油路上。
从车上下来的时候他是习惯性的像平时那样迈腿，但是膝关节太僵硬了，导致他一脚踏空，直接一个前趴亲吻了他挚爱的大地母亲。
“卧槽！”公交司机看到潘小闲趴在马路牙子上不动了，顿时吓得脸色煞白：“这特么是碰瓷儿新姿势吧？”
公交司机赶紧狠狠一脚地板油，借着夜色的掩护飞快逃离了现场。
这里是公交巴士的终点站，【华晨大学】的附近，仍然属于b区，但已经到了临近c区的边缘地带。不过这里并没有因此而叫做bc结合部。
只有a区、b区才有结合部，c区就是堕落、犯罪、腐烂、黑暗的代名词，所以在b区和c区之间被警方严格控制着，以保证a区和b区公民的合法权益以及……生命安全。
潘小闲上车的时候已经是七点多了，从ab结合部到华晨大学整整颠簸了一个小时，现在已经是八点多了。
如果是往常，潘小闲早就一个鲤鱼打挺跳起来了，从小练过两下野把式的他特别灵活，【武术课】各项测验可全都靠这个挣分了，现在潘小闲却是趴在马路牙子上几分钟还在“蠕动”。
他吃力的先双手撑住地面，然后努力弯曲腕关节、肘关节、肩关节，发力撑起上半身，再努力弯曲膝关节、踝关节……
简直就像是在做分解动作一样，潘小闲娇柔粉嫩的正太心这一刻真是碎得跟饺子馅似的。
最可恨的就是吃瓜群众的补刀！
“别扶他！”一对情侣手拉手走过时，本来那个女生心软的想要来扶起潘小闲，却立刻被男生紧紧的抓住手。
男生就跟防贼似的对女生嘀咕着警告：“大马路上千万别随便扶人，小心他赖上你，说是你把他给推倒的……这种人我见得多了，巴拉巴拉巴拉……
“你呀，总是这么单纯这么善良，没有我在身边可怎么办……”说到后来竟然是变成了宠溺的语气，而且还搭配了“摸头杀”技能，女生感动得泪水涟涟，甜蜜的说着“老公你最好了”，卿卿我我的绕过了潘小闲。
我尼玛……
潘小闲仿佛胸口中了两刀四洞，这特么还让不让人活了？
不但肆无忌惮的对一个单纯得好像白莲花般的英俊少年人参公鸡，甚至还要丧心病狂的秀恩爱虐单身狗！
潘小闲忍不住要发人深省的质问：现在的大学生都怎么了？
终于爬起来了，潘小闲长长的呼出一口气，短短几分钟，他有种再世为人的感觉。
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