第5章 英语零分
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“赵甲，辈分上是麻雀的叔，不过你喊我绰号就行，赵八两。”赵甲对这个韩伶印象不坏，挺水灵一妞，就算站在麻雀身边，那也是蛮般配。
麻雀？赵八两？
韩伶看了看心目中的白马王子，又瞧了瞧神秘人物赵甲，不知所措。
麻雀真名叫商雀，学习成绩一直名列前茅，稳居ts市前五名，那还是建立在他花大量时间跟赵甲这帮人厮混的前提上，典型的少年天才，很早就展露出多方面的天赋，高考前一个星期陪豹子去打群架，英勇负伤，高考的时候右手打着石膏绑着绷带，所有学科考试是用左手写的答案，把寄予厚望的校领导给弄崩溃了，可最终还能考出将近670的高分，其彪悍程度可见一斑，这疯子本来有机会进入中科少年班，奥数考卷就跟玩一样，所以对他这种变态角色来说，一般的所谓复旦高材生根本就不入法眼，加上人长得阴柔古典，又不是书呆子类型，完全是混混里的考试王者，在学校怎么可能不引来花痴无数，麻雀这种不入流的绰号当然不被外人熟知。
“你也得喊叔。”麻雀脸色依然不好看。
“叔。”韩伶还真恭恭敬敬喊了一声叔。
这就是她的聪明了，别说站在她面前的赵甲现在平平凡凡，就是个乞丐，能让完美男人商雀重视的人物，怎么可能是庸人，这就是根据逆向思维轻松推导出来的显而易见的结论，韩伶乐得卖个乖赢取印象分，能考进复旦，并且死缠商雀，当然需要不俗的资本。
“有漂亮室友一定要介绍给叔。”赵甲哈哈笑道。
“一定完成任务。”韩伶也欢快笑道，一口应承下来。
“我要和叔谈点事情，你先走吧。”麻雀不耐烦道。
韩伶皱了皱漂亮小脸，然后笑容迷人地跟赵甲道别。
“她父亲是ts滦县挺有名的一个煤商吧？”赵甲望着韩伶的背影轻声道。
麻雀点点头。
“多伶俐的一个千金小姐，你小子怎么就瞧不上。”赵甲笑道。
“太精明了，所以不够聪明。”麻雀轻轻松松一句话无形中就判了韩伶死刑。
“就你要求多，你应该和虎子综合一下，省得一个性冷淡一个性欲狂。”赵甲打趣道。
“叔，别拿虎子那头种马跟我放一块，那货迟早要死于梅-毒。”麻雀恶毒奸笑，意识到两个人站在校门口也不是个事，问道：“叔，不去我寝室坐坐？”
“不去，我今天就是熟悉一下地形，等下还要去其它学校转转，以后我会常来复旦听讲座的。你室友怎么样，有没有不太正常的家伙。”赵甲扶着自行车问道，视线却在经过校门的那些穿着清凉的女生身上流转，夏天真是一个流汗也值的季节啊。
“三个本地人，叽叽歪歪，也没个限度，我嫌烦，就骂了一句，然后就有家伙陆续跳出来，然后我就全给掀翻了，估计已经告到学院辅导员那里去了。反正到时候万一被警告或者劝退，离开复旦之前我一定让他们爹妈都认不出他们是谁儿子。”麻雀轻描淡写道。
“叉你妹，你走了，就等于我少了一个根据地，以后怎么看复旦美眉。”赵甲怒道。
“那咋办？”麻雀为难道。
“草，立即滚回去，告诉你室友，谁敢告就弄死谁，谁不信就玩到他信为止啊，老子平生最恨你们这帮成绩好还长得比我帅的畜生。”赵甲恨恨道，一脚踢在麻雀屁股上，“滚。”
麻雀乐呵呵地屁颠屁颠跑回去。
也不觉得是给了一个馊主意的赵甲就开始继续在大学城转悠，在他的朴素认知中，一个男人能解决事情的手段无非是相对高级的钱权和最简单的拳头，除非井水不犯河水大家相安无事，否则就都会陷入零和博弈的唯一性境地，不是你死我是我挂，所以把苗头强行扼杀在摇篮才是王道。
当赵甲转身离开复旦，背对那扇校门，也许没有任何一个同龄人知道这个看上去普普通通的家伙，是一个高考英语零分还能考出570分的神经病，更是一个中学时代能够使得所有数学和理科老师对英语同事心生怨言的疯魔人物。
简单来说，这位仁兄是整个ts市或者说hb省，唯一一个能够在数学和物理化全部死死压住商雀一截的怪胎。
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