第七百五十五章 欢乐的笨章鱼
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李佳玉扭开了门把，推门而出，但脸色却立马就僵住了，因为他看到黑暗章鱼那个混球就守在门口！
“哎哟，恭喜主人，贺喜主人，终于如愿以偿地得到了晚晴主母的圣女之躯……嘎嘎，主人你一定很爽吧，爆菊狂魔的名号一定很……”
“嘭”
李佳玉最烦的就是“爆菊狂魔”，以前被人口口声声喊为“帅妞”“光明女神”就已经够他烦恼透顶了，现在黑暗章鱼还敢喊他为“爆菊狂魔”，这简直是自寻死路，所以黑暗章鱼话还没说完，直接就被李佳玉一脚踹飞，如同馅饼般粘在了墙壁上，撕都撕不下来。
“啊啦，主人好狠心，你就是这样来对待红娘的吗……要不是章鱼辛辛苦苦地牵红线，恐怕再给你一年半载的时间，你也别想碰得到晚晴主母一根手指头……话说回来，你害什么躁，不就是爆菊吗，女人有三个妙处，是男人都懂……”
“你今天又发什么神经，这里可不是性知识传播教程，少来说废话了，我问你，是你救了染红霞的吗？”
“啊咧，当然啦……”黑暗章鱼那十六根触手都叉在腰间，得瑟地叫道，完全把碎梦刀的功劳都揽在自己身上。
“很好，你终于做了回好事……”李佳玉松了口气，对着黑暗章鱼比了比拇指。
“那当然的啦，章鱼是护花使者嘛，当然要竭尽全力去保护每一位主母的，要是主母们都挂掉，那主人你还建个屁的后宫啊？”章鱼又开始神经兮兮地傲然一笑了，颇有种天下寂寞的味儿。
李佳玉叹了口气，倒是没有跟黑暗章鱼过多地放嘴炮，而是直截了当地问道：
“昨晚的事……应该没其他人知晓了吧？”
“章鱼办事，主人放心，谁也不会知道主人捉住晚晴主母爆了菊花…还让她差点怀孕……嘿嘿，章鱼告诉他们，你和她正在拼命地给红霞主母疗伤，闲杂人等不能打扰咧……”说着，黑暗章鱼又露出一副猥琐的表情，挤眉弄眼道：“主人，老实交待，你昨晚那么过瘾，害得端庄矜持的晚晴主母都快叫破了嗓子……偏偏晚晴主母又是身娇体柔经不起长时间的蹂躏，那么，你在搞定了她之后……有没有把魔爪伸向红霞主母？”
李佳玉登时浑身一僵，尴尬无比地摇头，气急败坏道：
“放屁，我又不是大色魔，怎么可能会收了小姨还不够，偏又要把侄女也一起收了，你真把我当成欲求不满的大种马么？”
“啊咧，不是吗？那就太可惜了，虽然红霞主母受了绿帽神刀的诅咒……可你是她的心上人，你还是可以跟她有亲密接触的，只要不坏了她的贞洁……”
“闭嘴！别三句不离老本行，这可不是**小说！”
李佳玉一把揪住了黑暗章鱼的脑袋，对着它龇牙咧嘴地吼道：
“死章鱼，你不是在平行空间那里好好地待着么？怎么忽然间又回到我身边……”说到最后，李佳玉的声音越来越弱，感激之情不以言表，这回要不是黑暗章鱼及时赶回来，那么他就要给邕城陪葬了。
“呃……事情是这样的啦……”
黑暗章鱼噼里啪啦地就告诉了李佳玉真相，登时令李佳玉的脸色难看至极，青一阵红一阵，嘴角都在抽搐：
“就是说，你把战斗录像都给传到了网上？那群地球人，应该只是拿来当成科幻电影来欣赏吧？糟糕……我那时候好像还是光明女神之身……”
“对啊对啊，他们刚好看到主人你被菲奥娜女王用力地捏胸部、摸下面，我还给你屈辱的表情来了个特写，激发起全地球人的怜香惜玉之情，让他们同仇敌忾，在一瞬间爆发出超浓郁的信念之力……然后，我就用这股力量撕破了空间，回到你身边了……”
（未完待续）
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