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第1922章 不寂寞喽!

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对于一名吊丝來讲,最大的痛苦,莫过于搂着自己的女人看韩剧,她被剧情感染的声泪俱下,而自己则差点笑喷出声,那种憋屈,不亚于在高.潮即将來历之际,有人拿橡皮筋捆住了你的二兄弟,用‘欲罢不能’來形容,绝不为过。龙腾小说ltxs520.com

“你的泪点能再低点吗,这部电视机的尿点能再雷人一些吗。”犹如踩住了刘洁的尾巴,猛然扭头的刘洁,双手死死的掐在了肖胜脖颈处,大呼小叫的痛骂着肖胜的‘冷血’。

不是肖胜太冷血,而是剧情过于狗血,女主好的催人泪下,男猪总是阴错阳差的跟她擦肩而过,这还不为过,最后的伤离别,不是白血病,就是不治之症,要么就是高富帅看似灰姑娘的段子,你特娘的,这跟现实诧异也忒大了吧。

分分合合,合合分分,跟天下大势似得,在这期间,总能出现让人啼笑皆非的雷人段子,当然这跟国产的手撕鬼子,美女裸.杀汉奸,弹弓直奸一个鬼子连,还是有着不小的差距。

憋笑,只是开始,随着剧情的不断深入,感性的妹子,那千奇百怪的问題,更让你直呼蛋疼,总会问一些在你看來,绝对脑残的问題,不回答,说明你心里沒有她,敷衍了,那更不得了,河东狮吼有木有,说真话,她更会模仿剧情手撕你的二兄弟,说假话,明明心里乐滋滋,但脸上仍旧一副不屑一顾的表情。

在这一刻,女人‘八面玲珑’的一面,充分的展现在你的面前,无论你怎么回答,那都不合乎逻辑。

“你说分手了再复合,真的要经历这么多曲折吗。”面对刘洁的泪眼汪汪,不想打击对方的肖胜,深咽一口吐沫,半天才回答道:

“你是想让我从概率学方面给你解释,还是从实际情况给你剖析呢。”望着肖胜那正儿八经的表情,抿着嘴角的刘洁,喃喃道:

“都想,我想听实话。”挠了挠鼻角的肖胜,颇为为难,小心翼翼的解释道:

“分手的人重新复合的概率是82%,但是复合后能走到最后的概率只有3%,剩下的97%就会再次分手,分手的理由和第一次一样,也就是说,如果恋人之间有一点让对方心生厌恶的话,那么就如同碎了的玻璃,再粘在一起那也有缝隙,一捅,还是会碎。

所以从实际情况來讲,人这一生啊,有两样东西碰不得,一碰就恶心。”肖胜用赤.裸裸的数据,以及生动的表述方式,着实把刘洁的目光及思绪完全吸引至他的逻辑思维下。

“哪两样东西。”肖胜的话刚落音,刘洁便收起了抽泣,迫不及待的询问道。

“拉出去的屎,失而复得的感情,前者,不需要我多解释,后者,所谓的‘失而复得’,哪怕重新返厂贴了标签,那也是翻过新的,前期用的时候,啧,还是这个顺手,可后期矛盾一旦爆发,彼此的恶心度,绝对成倍上涨。

所以一段感情,要么精心呵护至底,要么,老死不再往來,吐出去的吐沫,再咽回去,那感觉,你懂得。”肖胜的‘一本正经’,使得刘洁陷入了沉思,随即联想到什么的她,猛然推了肖胜一把,瞪大明眸质问道:

“按照你的说法,如果我真跟你‘嗝屁’了,你绝对不回头。”假装很受伤的肖胜,捂着胸口,一脸夸张的表情,笑呵呵的回答道:

“就像你自己说的那样:你爱我,只会比我爱你多,既然你毅然决然的走出了这一步,那就说明,我真的把你伤透了,不是我不想回头,同样的痛,你再经历第二次,会痛上加痛,本性难移,这是事实。

与其让你对我‘咬牙切齿’,还不如互相保留那份情愫,说不定,哪天再见面,激情四射喽,还能再坦诚相待一次呢。

你瞅瞅现在多少男女,打着同学聚会的名义,干着‘约炮’的勾当。”肖胜是越说越嗨皮,而刘洁眼神,越來越歹毒,待到肖胜还准备滔滔不绝继续下去之际,这妮子,直接一个龙爪手,差点沒要了肖胜的‘命根’,在凄惨的求饶声中,肖胜妥协的对其说道:

“这种情况,根本不适合咱们俩,你觉得,我纳兰中磊的女人,谁敢再染指,我废了他。”

“我今天先废了你。”近乎赤.裸的两人,再次扭打在一起,当蠢蠢欲动的肖大官人,准备借此梅开二度之际,电视里那撕心裂肺,比死了娘都要让人抓狂的大哭声,着实让刘洁推开了身旁的肖胜,而此时的肖大官人,也被对方那犹如‘立花里子’(岛国,声线高亢到你想死)般杀猪声,直接给吓尿了。

“这是要玩死人的节奏吗。”而此时,目不转睛盯向电视的刘洁,再一次声泪俱下,半天才嘟囔道:

“女猪知道男猪为什么离开她了,白血病,还有不到一周的时间,哇,,我要砍了这个编剧。”边说,边转身的刘洁,张牙舞爪的劈向了身旁的肖胜,一脸无辜的肖胜,只得扬手被动挡格。

发泄一通的刘洁,在情绪稳定后,钻进了肖胜怀中,身子抽动不已,目光再次瞥向了电视机,而此时的肖胜,祈祷着赶紧停电吧,在这样下去,他会被这妮子的一惊一乍玩废的。

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