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三百五十六、哈哈哈哈哈,你们又输了。

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最新网址:m.ltxsdz.com

“这个跟你说吧,我手上有好几百条人命,现在无处可去,我今天就赖上你了,你给我想个办法。”

碰见过无赖,但真没碰过这么无赖的……要说手上有一两条人命还挺吓人的,但一张嘴就几百条人命,这特么有点虚啊,大佬。所以说啊,吹牛逼这种事得适度、适量,比如在网上说要杀光日本人,没人会当回事,但谁时时吹牛逼说要炸掉当地火车站看看,那可就有人来查水表的哦。

“你想怎么着吧,讹上我了是吧?”

“事情是这样的。”猴爷捏住了一根水管:“我想找工作。”

老板心头一紧,想想觉得还是要报警……但下一刻,他看到那根水管子居然被这个流浪汉一样的家伙给捏成了一团铁疙瘩……

“这是您住的地方,你也看见了……我这也不是太富裕,每天早上五点半上班,您要觉得想睡觉,那就十点上班吧,中午一点半开饭,您看……你要饿的话,就先吃。”

“行行行,你下去吧。”猴爷看了看这个阁楼:“还行,我就住在这了,五点半上班是吧?晚上几点吃饭?”

“七点……您看合适不?”

“合适合适。”

走下楼,老板都快哭了,这哪是请了个帮工啊,这简直是亲了亲爹过来住店啊。虽然阁楼地方差了点,但毕竟楼下就一间房,是他和他小姨子住的地方,阁楼好歹还算是个有光亮的地儿,不行恐怕就只能睡仓库了,而让这位爷睡仓库,他能把屋子都给拆了。

晚上吃了饭,他还殷勤的给猴爷送了衣裳和工作服,并被猴爷口头表扬一次……

不过让老板没想到的是,这位爷虽然有病了一点,但工作起来简直比牛还厉害,当他早晨五点半迷迷糊糊的去到厨房时,发现下头已经排满了新鲜面包,炉子里还在烤着一堆,弄一点尝尝发现居然味道出奇的好……不过就是有一点让他不爽,这厨房被弄的太干净了,一尘不染,这让他非常不自在。

“您……处女座的吧?”

“我不记得了。”猴爷吹着口哨正在打面粉:“还要一分钟出炉,你给收拾一下,把上面的焦糖玉米淋上去。”

“哦哦哦……”

平时一天才能卖的量,一个早上就卖了个干净。这一下面包房老板才意识到,自己着实特么的是捡到了个神人……高手在民间真不是吹牛逼的啊。

不过有一点让他感觉很诧异,那就是这个家伙完全不记得自己叫啥、不记得自己名字,甚至不记得自己几岁,用他本人的话来说,就好像是路边一颗狗尿苔突然成了精……

“那您得有个名儿啊,这我也好记账啊。”

“嗯……是这个道理。”正在厨房忙活的猴爷抬起头看着了一眼电视,然后指着电视上的孙悟空:“叫大圣怎么样?”

“随您喜欢……”

“不行不行,太招摇了。到时候再说吧,你就先随便起个外号好了。这一炉三分钟后出来,出来之后你给上头刷上枫糖,再复烤三分钟。”

“好……”

当然,鉴于老板文化水平有限,在记账的时候,他能想到的最好的名字也只有猴子这个外号了,毕竟这个家伙的发型看上去就像一只大马猴,而且那上蹿下跳精力无限的样儿也是一毛一样——

曾经有人跟我打赌,赌吃粑粑,最后他吃得嚼到腮帮子疼。

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