第八百一十章 宅男的恶趣味
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相比汉斯的疲软，坐在旁边的里肯，纵使疲惫的脸上挂着一副熊猫眼，但精神却是十分亢奋，我们说话的功夫，他已经连续喝下三杯麦酒了。
“吴凡老弟，我跟你说……”
抹干净嘴角的泡沫，里肯犀利一脚踢出，将旁边死去活来的汉斯搁到一边，顺势挪位坐上来，仿佛十天十夜没睡的熊猫眼里面挂着兴奋光芒。
“当时你没看到，那位西雅图克大人，太厉害，实在是太厉害了，他变成了一道巨大的龙卷风，几十万怪物根本就毫无还手之力，就算是攻击也给反弹回去，根本就是不费吹灰之力……”
眼睛里闪烁着极度激动的光芒，里肯滔滔不绝的喷起了口水，真看不出，这个看似和白发老头一样总是面带着和蔼和沉稳气息的家伙，竟然也是一个追星族。
“一个人逼退了几十万怪物，几十万……我靠！！”
最后，里肯高举双手，发出仿佛虔诚教徒一般的感叹，就差没有曲膝膜拜了，结果话没落音就被站起来的汉斯一脚踢在他坐着的凳腿子上，整个人随着凳子翻了下去，最后两个字是从桌底下发出来的。
“不就是逼退了几十万怪物大军么，乱激动个什么，不知道我头正疼着？”
劳累的汉斯没有一点平时的法师文雅形象，到是像个染了一头红发做了个非主流发行的小流氓，一脚将里肯坑了以后，他犹自不解气的往桌底下踹了几脚。
“你这个家伙，什么叫【不就是逼退了几十万怪物大军】？说的你是什么厉害角色似的，侮辱我没有关系，但是敢侮辱西雅图克大人，我跟你没完！！”
费力从桌底下爬起来的里肯，通红着双眼，作状扑上去要和汉斯决一死战。
“我是没这个本事，不过不代表这里没人有。”
汉斯一边抽出法杖，一边不屑道。
“咦？”
里肯一愣，目光转溜几下，动作停滞在半空，仿佛有无数问号从他脑袋里冒出来。
“你脑袋长屁股上了吗？就在眼前，眼前！！”
汉斯怒从心中起，恶向胆边生，一法杖就瞧在里肯头上，然后用法杖指了指我这边。
依然是半睡半醒一样的迷糊目光，看向这边，里肯的脑袋里仿佛有一个闹钟，在滴答滴答走着，然后叮铃铃
“我怎么就给忘记了呢？！”
拍着手心，里肯恍然大悟的抓着他那头绅士一般疏剪整齐的白发，那羞愧的样子似乎恨不得汉斯再敲他几下。
里肯终于记起来了，眼前这个吴凡老弟，才是以一人之力逼退怪物大军的首创者，而且高地之城也是他的功劳，这其中任何一项荣耀都不比西雅图克来得差，自己放着眼前这个更大的功臣不说，却将西雅图克捧的天花乱坠，真是瞎白了一双狗眼。
“不过，始终是无法想象，那个人竟然会是吴凡老弟您呀，还是联盟长老，啧啧”
汉斯的八卦之魂似乎也因此而燃起了一点点，将他那刺目的红色汉堡头凑过来，用着精明的家庭主妇走在菜市场时所发出的目光，上下打量着我。
“可以理解。”
咽下最后一口果汁，我耸耸肩膀道。
这道理就跟明星一样，得有距离感才行，打个比方说，邻居家拖着两条鼻涕的二狗子突然摇身一变成了天皇巨星，金光闪闪的出现在你面前，你能立刻升得起崇拜的感觉么？可能心中的扭曲感反而居多吧，距离产生美感就是如此。
这样也好，要是里肯像刚刚夸西雅图克一样夸自己，那样反倒更让我觉得别扭和不自在呢，眼下这种感觉就刚刚好。
“的确，明明吴凡老弟这个大活人就站在面前，我还是一点都感觉不到，眼前这个人竟然会是拯救整个西部王国的大英雄。”
里肯也学着汉斯，将脸凑上来仔细打量着我。
喂喂，你们给我适可而止吧，两个大男人将脸凑上来，就不嫌恶心么？你们不要脸我还要呢。
背靠向椅子，拉远距离，我朝两张大脸贼笑一声：“要不，试一试？”
里肯和汉斯你看看我，我看看你，然后以能扭断脖子的速度拼命摇着头。
认清熟人之间不可能存在偶像这一事实之后，汉斯重新颓废的坐了回去，半拉不搭的瘫软在桌子上面。
“不如我教你一个能提起精神的魔法吧，这可是我从某个旧图书馆管理员那里学来的招式哦。”
看着汉斯倒在桌子上的醒目红色卷发汉堡头，我心中升起了一个恶趣味的念头……
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