第九百三十章 神界父母多奇葩
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“那啥,宝贝,我总觉得咱们一定是哪里搞错了。”
看着珊多拉津津有味地吃着新鲜的草茎(当然我自己也尝了点),我觉得怎么这么怪呢。
平心而论我觉得你们谁都没有过这种约会经历吧?
“有什么不对的?”珊多拉舔了舔嘴唇,“阿俊觉得这样会不高兴吗?啊,你尝尝这个,这种长三片叶子的草好像是浇汁麦香麻辣鸡腿味的。”
……叮当,你平常到底是有多无聊?
看来事实已经没法改变了,我必须学着适应身边这一个个不正常的家伙给自己带来的不正常的日常,或许和珊多拉约会的时候看着她吃草也是一种另类的浪漫吧:人呐,得有一颗知足常乐的心,要不我总有一天得让身旁这群欢乐的姑娘给折腾出毛病来。
我正这么想着呢,突然感觉身旁一阵暖暖的香风袭近,紧接着怀中就多了一个柔软的躯体。
珊多拉毫无预兆地钻了过来,让人很是意外,不过我也没说什么,只是轻轻捏了捏对方的鼻子,低头在她唇上轻轻一吻:“怎么了?”
“没事,就是想让阿俊抱一下。”怀中的少女低声说道,声线悦耳轻柔,很难想象这同样的声音在另一面会是那么冷冽尊贵,我微微一愣,便微笑起来,向后仰躺在草坪上,胸口趴着珊多拉,那一头黄金瀑布般的金色长发肆意摊开,几乎要把两人包裹在一个茧中……真是奇怪的联想。
珊多拉或许是想用自己的方法让我暂时忘掉那些烦心事儿吧,包括拉着我来看云海,以及一块吃草——也不知道她是从哪学到的这些古怪方法,但肯定是从外界学来的,因为以这丫头原本的身份,她怎么能想到这种复杂的小把戏。虽然可能是过于关心,她低估了某人的神经韧度,不过看到她这样笨笨的努力,其实也是一件非常让人开心的事情。
“丫头,你说……”
我开口了,却没听到怀中少女的回应,一低头,却发现珊多拉已经闭着眼睛,在自己怀中发出了十分轻柔的呼噜声:她竟然睡着了。
原本珊多拉对外界的任何变化都是极端敏锐的,几乎不存在就这么放心大胆进入深度睡眠的可能,但或许是趴在恋人的怀中就能得到最大的安全感,这样一个女王陛下,竟然跟在野外玩累了的小女孩一样,就如此酣然入梦了。
“真是不可思议,各种意义上。”
脑海中突然传来了这样一句话,我抬眼看了看旁边,映入眼帘的是一袭华丽的黑色晚礼服,还有几乎拖到脚踝的银白色长发。
“妾身来的好像有点不是时候?”
冰蒂斯通过精神连接跟我说道,居高临下地看着我跟珊多拉如同荒野弃尸一样在她脚下躺着——看,又是一个特神奇的联想。
我抬着眼皮看向上方,感觉风景不错,但还是扭过头去提醒了一声:“喂喂,你全走光了啊。”
这个女流氓难道就不能偶尔有一点女孩子的自觉么?你站的这个位置很剽悍好不好!
冰蒂斯对我的提醒似乎压根没往心里去,最起码没听到她惊呼一声什么的,这家伙只是大大咧咧地按了按礼服的长裙,然后在我旁边坐下来,看着已经趴在我胸口睡着的珊多拉,用精神连接和我交流:“不可思议,你知道么,从前的珊多拉无论如何不会露出这种没心没肺的模样。”
我一声轻叹:“我就没见她吃饱之后有心有肺过。”
冰蒂斯撇了撇嘴,视线向远处望去,那里有一大片光秃秃的土地,对此,流氓女神表示感叹:“看样子你的珊多拉草原放养计划终于成功了:这丫头吃掉整整三百多平米的草地啊!”
我:“……为什么你会知道这个放养计划?”
冰蒂斯白了我一眼:“珊多拉告诉我的。你晚上说梦话,宣布要把她扔到大草原上自己觅食,被枕边人听到了,然后她心情抑郁到第二天中午吃饭。你这家伙到底有谱没谱。”
总觉得被冰蒂斯这么说,自己的人生简直是太失败了:连这个女流氓都质疑我有谱没谱吗?!
我轻轻抚弄着珊多拉那一头泻地的金发,将它们慢慢缠在手指上,用精神连接问道:“说起来,两三天没看到你,去干吗了?”
三天前冰蒂斯突然跟我们说她要出任务,然后就没了音信,今天是刚刚回来,刚才她出现的时候还让我稍微有点惊讶来着,神族条子五人组剩下那四个笨蛋对这个流氓女神的动向也不清楚,我本人更是没有能直接联系上冰蒂斯的方法,所以大家一度以为这家伙是去某个偏远宇宙收取保护费结果不幸被神界风纪委逮到关了禁闭,但现在看来她好像只是出门办事,所以我对她这几天的动向有些好奇。
“妾身回了神界一趟,”冰蒂斯认真地把珊多拉的头发跟地上的野草绑在一起,一边随口说道,“家里的老爷子让妾身给你带个好,老妈还给水银灯做了好几件小衣服……嘶,你那倒霉闺女为什么要和妾身长的这么像?二老现在还以为那是妾身跟你的私生女呢!”
我:“……这个不是我的错吧?”
“少废话,本来妾身一天就回来了,老妈非逼着妾身学习怎么给孩子喂奶!那么大个的孩子用喂奶吗?!他们这是想下辈人想疯了吧!”
我一听这话顿时愣住,冰蒂斯爹妈的奇葩程度简直是令人叹为观止,然后自己就不由自主地看了某流氓女神的凶器一眼,思前想后总结出一句话来:“水银灯兴没那么大饭量……”
然后冰蒂斯一板砖就糊过来了。
“总之,这次回神界惹了一脑门子麻烦,”冰姐拍了拍手,继续把珊多拉的头发跟野草编织在一起,“另外父神让我给你说一声,过一阵子可能要邀请你再过去一趟,有极端重要的事情商议。”
这一次,我是真的愣住了。
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