第一千三百七十七章 折腾人的一宿
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我一瞬间转过成吨的想法,思绪纷杂到自己都不知道自己想了些什么,但最后,那些纷乱的思绪慢慢退却,我突然觉得自己可能是想通了什么,一下子轻松起来。
“嗯?陈你刚才想什么呢?”冰蒂斯应该是能感受到灵魂另一半的动静,顿时好奇地问道,“妾身怎么觉得……一阵发寒呢?”
“没啥,你的错觉。”我呵呵一笑,随后轻车熟路地把冰蒂斯的身躯横抱起来,真是奇怪呐,现在才意识到自己哪怕抱着她也不会感觉到丝毫别扭了,你说这是什么时候变成这样的?
我把她小心地放在床上,帮她整理着头发,整理了半天,强迫症都被逼出来了:“你头发怎么这么难打理呢!”
“你费这事干嘛,妾身的头发压不乱的。”
“……我强迫症犯了,你说你平常睡觉的时候头发怎么处理?都压在身子底下还是搭在床外面?或者提前弄个睡觉专用的发型之类?”
听到我的问题,冰蒂斯顿时沉默下来,足足半分钟没动静,最后她气急败坏地大叫:“看你这倒霉催的问题!妾身也tm纠结了!妾身平常到底是怎么睡觉来着——”
我目瞪口呆:“……我好像想起个笑话……”
“闭嘴。”
“好吧,我不说了。”我耸耸肩,把冰蒂斯那几乎和身体一样长的头发仔细整理到床外,弄成了一条银色的瀑布,然后看到她还睁着眼睛,便伸手帮她阖上眼皮:“好好睡觉啊。这次别乱跑了。”
一秒钟后我才毛骨悚然起来:这桥段怎么这么像是冰蒂斯死不瞑目呢?
我憋着这个“死不瞑目”的想法,在床另一边小心翼翼地躺下来——说到底果然还是挺尴尬的,也幸亏冰蒂斯家是土豪,或者说每个神族都是土豪,这张床要再拉长点都快能停上去一辆坦克了。我就在这张可以用广阔形容的大床上小心地盘踞下来,跟旁边那具曼妙的身躯保持足够距离。冰蒂斯这个一向彪悍的女流氓一遇上真格的果然也缩了,沉默良久她才颤巍巍地憋出一句话来:“你个禽兽,绝对不准真动手啊。妾身现在没反抗能力,你要趁妾身睡觉下手试试……”
我:“你不是天不怕地不怕么,刚才我说打地铺你还不愿意呢。”
“少废话,妾身多少也是女孩子,这时候要再没危机感那得多缺心眼。妈蛋,不想睡地铺。还得时刻担心一觉醒来发现自己正以第一视角推自己,你知道本女神现在纠结成啥样了么!”
女人心海底针,冰姐的心大概就相当于钛合金坨子里熔了根针,反正自己是捉摸不透的。我嘴角上翘,带起一个微笑:当然,冰蒂斯肯定看不到。随后我转过身背对着她的身体:这是必须的,无论如何那位女神的身材都有点好的出奇了,甚至用完美都不够形容,即便有一层薄被也难以掩饰冰姐的惊艳身姿。再加上夜色下那平添了一份圣洁与恬静感的绝美侧颜,哪怕我定力没问题也有可能睁着眼到天亮,这不平白给自己找麻烦么。
但也不知道是不是太过在意反而产生了错觉,明明离的很远,我还是感到近在咫尺有温热的体温和冰蒂斯身上独有的那种清香不断传来。感觉到自己灵魂中还有另外一份躁动不安的来源,我忍不住开口:“还没睡?”
“……别提了,还琢磨睡觉的时候头发怎么放呢……”
我顿时心如止水不再纠结,把珊多拉她们的音容笑貌在脑海中滚屏播出了几十遍,酣然入梦。
这短短的后半夜终于安然度过。
感觉只是睡了一小会。窗外便天光大亮了。我睁开眼。看到有点陌生的天花板,稍微反应片刻才想起来自己正在冰蒂斯家。然后才把昨晚上的事情全部回忆起来,赶紧看向身旁:幸好,后半夜冰姐的身体没有到处乱跑,还老老实实地躺在原位置,既没有姿态暧昧地缠过来,也没睡相不佳春光全漏地在那当福利放送机:我很担心假如这事儿真发生,冰爹冰妈立刻就敢扛着婴儿车顺便把我绑架到父神殿去让父神证婚……
亏昨天她还惹出那么大的乱子,现在倒是睡的死沉:没脑子果然是一件幸福的事儿。
我起床,下地,换衣服——话说最开始的时候珊多拉还挺纠结我跟冰蒂斯卡在一块,换衣服的时候该怎么办,结果没两天就顾不上纠结这种细枝末节了,事实证明人的不习惯都是源于没被逼到那份上。冰蒂斯懒洋洋的声音也适时地在脑海中响起:“哦,早。”
“你醒了,不多睡会?”我很自然地跟她打招呼,在一起卡了这么多天,现在我都快养成早起和冰蒂斯互道早安的习惯了,不会像刚开始两三天那样,早晨突然听见她跟自己打招呼还会被吓一跳。
“啊,根本没睡,”冰蒂斯的声音听上去格外有气无力,“妾身好累。”
“你后半夜没睡?!”我大惊,“你这么没心没肺还有失眠的时候?”
“……滚,现在还tm在想睡觉的时候头发到底放哪呢,你别跟妾身说话啊,火大了妾身唱歌烦死你。”
我:“……”
我大冰姐竟然也有这么可爱的时候——她的强迫症应该已经达到不治之症了吧?
“等等,我突然想到件事,”自己还是忍不住跟冰蒂斯说话了,因为她的身体已经醒过来,而且按照“最高命令”,一脸木然地站到了我身后,身上穿着轻薄的睡衣,“怎么给她穿衣服?”
“……别想着占便宜。闭上眼,转过去,屏蔽感知,妾身自己穿。”
我听话地照办,但转过去之后才反应过来:“意义何在!”
“哦擦,忘了妾身跟你在一块卡着呢,你看不见妾身也看不见了。”
于是我俩就因为这个简单的问题纠结起来,一直纠结到莫的声音在门外响起:女管家来看客人是否已经起床,并通知我们早饭已准备好。
我顿时就觉得自己这脑子是被洞给毁了:神殿里多少侍女!再不济还有个女管家!昨晚上冰蒂斯的睡衣是谁给换的!你说我俩这智力怎么就突然不够用了呢?
我和冰蒂斯讨论了一番,最后冰姐觉得是俩人在一起卡的时间太长,其中一个人拉低了平均智商,接下来一直到饭厅之前我俩都在拼命否认拉低智商的那个人是自己……
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