六、处男生子
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我断开了神经连接器,吐了口长气,想要喝口咖啡,却发现自己刚泡好的咖啡,已经不知道给哪个孙子喝光了。最新地址ltxsba.pw寝室里八个牲口,除了我之外每一个人都有嫌疑,但我可以肯定,就凭这群货色的节操,我是铁铁没法抓住偷喝咖啡的王八蛋了。
“妈的!早就该出去租房子了,寝室这是不能住了,撸管都要要担心被人偷走卷纸。”
我扫了一眼寝室,现在是一个禽兽也没回来,正有些百无聊赖,寝室的门被人轻轻推开,一个七八岁的小孩子猫着腰走了进来。
“喂喂!你谁家的孩子?”
“爸爸!”
“爸爸你个头!别乱认爹,我可还是处男!”
这个小孩子生的很漂亮,别说,还真的跟我有些像,但比我这副怂包的样子可帅了二十五倍还不止。
他很有些老成持重的咳嗽了一声,递过来三张打印纸,淡淡的说道:“我妈说,当年你跟她在一起的时候,也吹嘘自己是处男,但因为床技过于娴熟,引起了她的猜疑。后来我妈妈经过艰苦卓绝的走访和调查,统计了您的一百八十六位前任的资料,您才无话可说。当然这个统计表格不怎么zhǔnquè,我妈说,最少也遗漏了百分之三十以上……”
“我能告你妈诽谤么?”
我粗粗的浏览了这几张打印纸,的确有很多触目惊心的míngzì,这些妞确实是我前任,但最少有七成我绝逼没搞过,甚至都不认得。
谁特么的跟我开这么恶劣的玩笑?老子真特么的是处男!每次被女人甩,我都会觉得自己恢复成了纯情小处男,当然只是心理上恢复,肉体上是无论如何也恢复不过来了。
“不能!因为我妈今年才十二岁!”
“我勒个去!你小子是穿越来的么?快告诉叔叔,你真爹真妈是谁?我这就送你回去,肯定是哪个不检点的学长……唔,也有可能是不检点的老师,生出你这种奇葩的小孩来。”
“我要是奇葩,你就是奇葩他爹!”
“你妈十二岁,你最少有八岁了吧?”
“七岁!zhǔnquè的说,七岁另两个月,今年才上一年级!”
“这还不够奇葩么?”
小孩很无奈的耸了耸肩膀,淡然自若的说道:“区区重生而已,哪里有奇葩?”
我怒极反笑,指着这小崽子,叫道:“你是否先打听一下,这本书是重生,还是网游?”
小孩zài次耸了耸肩膀,用很裨益的眼神看着我,慢悠悠的说道:“重生回来玩游戏现在是潮流!土鳖老爹?”
“重生回来玩网游?现实里怎么会有这么违反现实,不合常理的鬼玩意?我不是你爹,我还是处男!”
小男孩摊开双手,无奈的说道:“这本书的作者一贯没节操,他把这本书写成什么样,我都不会感觉到奇怪。还有,不要在我面前提处男这个词了,你是处男,我哪里来的?二手处男老爹!”
我平时也很自负口才,但在这个七岁大的小男孩面前,却几次三番败下阵来,唇枪舌战了半个小时,我很有些精疲力尽,精神空虚。
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