第120章 触动灵魂的音乐
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台下观众愣神片刻，顿时轰然大笑。龙腾小说ltxs520.com他们听懂了，原来是演幽默对对碰的两个演员食物中毒去洗胃了，节目就由李文载来代演。
后台，紧张的牛大年看到李文载的发挥，听到台下的笑声，顿时松了口气，脸上露出了笑意，这小子果然没让自己失望。
李文载敲了敲木鼓，继续道：“今天要给大家讲的，是由西游记改编而来的小幽默，内容纯属胡扯，如有雷同，别来找我。”
下面又是一阵哄笑。
“话说四个和尚前去西天取经，从长安出发。没飞几分钟，飞机缓缓降落，没油了！”
哗！哄！
“卧槽，他也太能搞了吧，唐僧不是骑白龙马，而是开飞机去取经！”
“亮点是，没飞几分钟就没油了！”
李文载继续：“悟空这个找啊，哪有加油站呢？唐僧就纳闷，怎么这么快就没油了？八戒在旁边比划，油箱就肥皂盒这么大点儿，一次性加五块钱的油。唐僧郁闷，那得加到多咱去啊。”
“中间加了十万多次还没到，这西天在哪呢？师徒四个一合计，不行，咱得问问路。一捏闸，嘎吱！飞机停下，悟空跳下来，一瞧，嗬，这什么地啊，怎么这么荒。见一老头正在锄地，沙僧从旁边屁颠屁颠的跑过去：Hi！Hello！Howareyou！”
“八戒旁边羡慕，三师弟的英文说的真好，还是正宗的伦敦腔。”
台下观众乐成一片，这家伙也太能恶搞了吧。
“老农听到沙僧的话一回头：干哈呀？好嘛，一口大茬子味，东北啊！沙僧问：大爷，这西天怎么走？老农拄着锄头一副看白痴的模样道：那道往脖子上一抹就到了。”
观众顿时把嘴里的水啊，爆米花之类都喷出来了。
“靠，差点呛死我！”
“活该，谁让你这个时候喝水的！倒霉的是我，被你喷了一身！”
“这家伙，害得我大米花走到岔道里面，咳得我这个难受！”
随后的十多分钟里，幽默不断，台下观众笑得前仰后合。笑点低的，更是差点没喘上气来憋死。
“什么，邮箱太小？没等四人把话说完，如来不高兴了：不是早就传过去了吗？全套经书连插图录音真人DV都传过去了，邮箱怎么可能不够用！四人疑惑，相视茫然。如来指着桌上的电脑道：这么轻轻一点，经书就email过去了，你们大唐早就用上我的经书了。”
台下的观众已经笑得没有力气了，台上这家伙将西游记完全颠覆了。开飞机取经，比美国人早登月，飞船摔到极乐世界门口，如来用电脑发邮件，这他妈还是西游吗？可怎么就这么好笑呢！
李文载笑眯眯的道：“看来我的节目还可以，不过医务室还有两个倒霉蛋，我得去看看他们洗胃洗的怎么样？如果他们的消化系统不错，我估计还得灌肠。双管齐下，可怜啊。拜拜了。”
李文载晃晃悠悠的下去，台下观众反应慢了半拍，随后才反应过来双管齐下的意思，又是捂着肚子一阵狂笑。
李文载对牛大年笑道：“牛导，不辱使命。”
牛大年也笑的流眼泪，擦擦泪水，牛大年拍拍李文载的肩膀：“大恩不言谢，以后有需要帮忙的地方就说。”
李文载笑着点头，低声道：“这件事恐怕不是那么简单，您还是找人查查。”
牛大年冷笑起来，眼中寒光四射，道：“敢暗算我牛大年，饶不了他！”
节目继续，倒是没再出什么乱子。
终于，到了李文载的独唱。
报幕结束，李文载接过对面那个女孩递过来的话筒，目光若有所思，似笑非笑的看了她一眼，让女孩心惊肉跳。
李文载转身上台，没有人看到，李文载握着话筒的手电磁力场转动，里面某个硬件遭到彻底的破坏。
“Hi！Hello！Howareyou！It’smetoo！”李文载一边走上台一边打招呼。
观众想起了之前的单口相声，顿时一阵大笑。
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