159 我是来打脸的（上）
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有维多利亚牵线搭桥，李晓峰自然乐意，他早就想看看这个传说中极端猥琐的老头到底是个什么德行，更想知道这个一心想当英雄的老头为什么不亲自实现自己的梦想。龙腾小说网ltxs520.com说实话，他真的很好奇。
和其他的老头一样，老赫姆斯特拉先生也住在郊外，房子不小，加上花园草坪，几十亩地下不来。唯一让李晓峰纳闷的是，别人家的花园种的都是花草植物，而老头的花园却一片荒凉，到处都是黄土堆和坑坑洼洼的土洞。一时间让李晓峰想到后世的拆迁工地和澳大利亚荒原上被兔子们“啃”过的地面。
李晓峰好奇的问：“这里闹兔子？”
维多利亚耸耸肩，答道：“不，这一片最后一只野兔子在十年前已经被安吉丽娜的爷爷给烤着吃了。你看到的这一切都是老头的杰作。”
这算什么杰作？李晓峰呐喊的想到，老头是搞土木工程的，还是说对修地球有特殊的喜好，不然能把好好的森林花园改成刚果布拉柴维尔的荒地？
维多利亚撇撇嘴，似乎没兴趣解释，只是吩咐道：“看下去你就知道了！”
李晓峰还没明白怎么回事，嘹亮的军号声就从大土堆的另一面响了起来，紧接着急促的鼓点咚咚的敲个不停，仿佛在大土堆的另一面驻扎着一支军乐队。
“搞音乐的？”李晓峰猜测道。
维多利亚讥笑的摇摇头，但是却不置可否。就在某仙人准备快步冲上黄土堆看个真切的时候，随着鼓点的节奏，黄土堆后面冒出了一支军队！
李晓峰诧异的揉揉眼，确定自己没有眼花。他确实看到了一支军队雄赳赳气昂昂的挺着枪刺向前开进。可笑的蓝军装、连裤袜。插着鸟毛的帽子，嗯嗯，最最可笑的是他们手里的烧火棍——那个啥，谁把博物馆里的老古董燧发火枪给弄出来了！
李晓峰明显觉得自己的脑子有死机的迹象，如果不是他又一次穿越到了拿破仑时代，那么就是他碰上了一群蹩脚的模仿者。怎么说呢！虽然后世的军迷也喜欢cosplay，但是最多也就是盟军打纳粹的水平，玩玩二战时候的老古董已经很嗨了。模仿拿破仑时代的战斗，说真的，条件真有些高。
正思考间，在老赫姆斯特拉先生花园的尽头。急促的马蹄声响起，几十骑风卷残云一般的狂奔过来，卷起漫天的黄土，弄得李晓峰和维多利亚灰头土脸。
俩人面面相觑，维多利亚解释道：“看见为首的那个小个子骑兵了吗？那就是你要找的人！”
李晓峰眯起眼睛。透过层层黄土烟，仔细的打量着老头。老头个子的确很矮，不说在人高马大，人比熊还壮的俄国。就算是在这个时代的中国也算矮的，他这个身高最多去日本欺负武大郎的后代。
除了个头很矮之外。老头更是瘦得像一只猴子，套上龙骑兵的头盔和胸甲。还真有点猕猴而冠的意思。可是偏偏老头骑在马上的表情还无比严肃，仿佛真是带领千军万马在敌阵中冲杀的将军。
反正李晓峰是觉得场面无比可笑，尤其是双方短兵相接之后，场面就更加的滑稽，骑术不精的骑士像跛腿的蛤蟆一样摔倒在地，受惊的步兵兄弟没头没脑的躲避着暴走的马儿，不断有人摔倒、不断有人丢掉手里的武器，更有那胆小的竟然哇哇的坐倒在地大哭起来。
“真是一场闹剧！”李晓峰摇了摇头都不忍心看了。
对此维多利亚表示万分同意：“确确实实是一场闹剧……而且这样的闹剧每隔三五天都要再次上演一遍！”
“什么！”李晓峰眼珠子都要掉出来了，他算是知道赫姆斯特拉家的花园为什么变成荒地了，以老头的折腾劲，恐怕就是有花花草草也被踏成黄泥。
“其实这还不是最可怕的！”维多利亚很无奈的说道，“最糟糕的是，这些人大部分都是老头子花钱请来的演员……当我的小姨费尽心思为家里节省每一个戈比的时候，这个可恶的老头竟然死性不改的一掷千金，上帝怎么不拿雷劈他！”
李晓峰看了看气鼓鼓的维多利亚，又瞧了瞧“沙场”上意气风发左右突杀的老头，他不得不承认老头确实很邪恶很猥琐，不管是谁碰上了这种问题老爷爷都会觉得挠头的。不过李晓峰还是不明白老头为什么不真刀真枪的上战场爽一把，至少那样成本更低。
维多利亚指指点点的解释道：“你仔细看，如果能上战场他早就去了，老头的腿脚不是太利索！”
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