628 蓬门今始为君开
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那段感情过去了两三年，你的女朋友也换了好几个。
我还常常站在那里，看你和她们亲密的互动，那样的默契，那样的甜蜜，丝毫不输于咱们在一起的时候。
为什么你已经大步向前，我还要停在原地，被它困扰呢？总不可能，五年十年以后，我还停在原处吧？我也有自己的人生啊。”
倪裳眼波流转，在对面男生的脸上转了一转，“我在宿舍的床上拷问我唯一一次放纵的时候。
后来我专门写过一封信给吴茵，替自己辩护。
我告诉她，失去母亲对我是何等沉重的一个打击，所以如果有不适当的表现，请她务必包容。
我也告诉她，我能感受到你是很爱很爱她的。
可是，似乎就因为一次小小的争吵，一切都结束了，四年的感情说没就没。
她们看着我，好像我知道答案，甚至我就是答案。
可我又怎么知道你是怎么想的？”倪裳说：“可是，我觉得我很克制自己。
在青峰陵园的时候，大概是她伸出手，近乎呢喃的请求，“抱我。”
开始，他似乎已乱了心绪，不知道该如何应对，像是那个十七岁的毛头小伙子一样，只懂傻傻的坐着，那些所谓的聪明应变全遗落在某个角落。
江之寒僵在那里，不能点头，也不能摇头。
今晚从倪裳倾诉的那一刻情书，有的人当面表白过。
但他们中的绝大多数，大概不过是觉得我长的还行，被拒绝了或是没有回音很快就转移了目标。
但有那么一两个，他们一直在那里。
倪英竹你是见过的。
从进校开始，他就一直很照顾我。
他是那种很温柔很细致的男生，很典型的江南男生。
那时候，他对我说，为了我愿意留下来博士，虽然这不是他的选。
那也算是他委婉的表白了，但我劝他，要以事业为重。
后来那天晚上见过你，他大概觉得我是因为有个背景深厚的朋友，才对他不置可否，所以很快就转身离开了。
他走的时候，我送他去火车站，回学校坐在公车上，我也在问自己。
也许，他确实不如你优秀，但他对我很好啊，而我也并不要求我的男朋友要多么多么的优秀。
为什么上一段感情过去了那么久，它还在困扰我呢？”女孩儿淡淡的说：“在大学里，很多人追求过我。
有的人写过很长的就好像，这六年便不曾分开过。
音呢……”倪裳看着他，“是吗，之寒？也许我们不过在等那只落下来的鞋的声大家都能意识到在大自然面前人类的渺小。
摈弃仇恨，要从自己做起。
p.s.悼念所有在大地震中受难的人，愿活着的人都能坚强，愿上夜班，回家很晚。
他有个坏习惯，睡觉前把鞋脱了，重重的扔到地上。
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