第二百一十二章 吓出屎来了
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??书接上文，那老儿战战兢兢，口不能言，又推耳聋，一句不应。更多小说ltxsba.com
孙悟空见他不言，即抽身回坡。
刘晨见孙悟空回来，笑着问道：“悟空，你回来了？问的怎么样了？”
孙悟空回答道：“不打紧！不打紧！西天有便有个把妖精儿，只是这里人胆小，把他放在心上，没事，没事！有我哩！”
刘晨继续道：“你可曾问他此处是什么山，什么Ｄ，有多少妖怪，哪条路通得雷音？”
猪八戒上前道：“师伯，莫怪我说，若论赌变化，化斋饭，捉弄人，我三五个也不如师兄；若论老实，像师兄这样就摆一大队，也不如我。”
唐僧闻言道：“正是！正是！师兄啊！还是猪八戒老实。”
猪八戒道：“他不知怎么钻过头不顾尾的，问了两声就跑回来了，等俺老猪去问他个实信来。”
唐僧对猪八戒道：“悟能，你仔细些，看看能问出来什么。”
好个呆子，把钉钯撒在腰里，整一整皂直裰，扭扭捏捏，奔上山坡，对老者叫道：“老公公，贫僧唱喏了。”
那老儿见孙悟空回去，方拄着杖挣得起来，战战兢兢的要走，忽见猪八戒，愈觉惊怕道：“爷爷呀！今夜做的什么恶梦，遇着这伙恶人！为先的那和尚丑便丑，还有三分人相；这个和尚，怎么这等个碓梃嘴，蒲扇耳朵，铁片脸，毧毛颈项，一分人气儿也没有了！”
猪八戒笑道：“你这老公公不高兴，有些儿好褒贬人，你就是这么看我哩？我丑虽丑，但是奈看，再停一会儿就俊了。”
那老者见他说出人话来，只得开言问他：“你是哪里来的？”猪八戒道：“我是唐僧第二个徒弟，法名叫做悟能猪八戒，才自先问的，叫做孙悟空孙悟空，是我师兄，他冲撞了公公，不曾问得实信，所以我来拜问，此处是什么山什么Ｄ，Ｄ里果是什么妖精，哪里是西去大路，劳烦公公指示指示。”
那老者道：“你可老实么？”猪八戒道：“俺老猪没别的，就是老实，生平没有一毫虚的。”
那老者道：“你莫像刚才来的那个和尚走花弄水的胡缠。”
猪八戒嘿嘿的笑道：“我不像他。”
那老者拄着杖，对猪八戒说道：“此山叫做八百里狮驼岭，中间有座狮驼Ｄ，Ｄ里有三个魔头。”
猪八戒啐了一声：“你这老儿却也多心！三个妖魔，也费心劳力的来报遭信！”老公公道：“你不怕么？”
猪八戒道：“不瞒你说，这三个妖魔，我师兄一Ｇ就打死一个，我一钯就筑死一个，我还有个师弟，他一降妖杖又打死一个，都不用劳烦我那个神通广力无边的师伯动手，三个都打死，我师父就过去了，有何难的！”
那老者笑道：“这和尚不知深浅！那三个魔头，神通广大得很哩！他手下小妖，南岭上有五千，北岭上有五千，东路口有一万，西路口有一万；巡哨的有四五千，把门的也有一万；烧火的无数，打柴的也无数：共计算有四万七八千，这都是有名字带牌儿的，专在此吃人。”
那呆子闻得此言，战兢兢跑转来，相近唐僧，也不回话，放下九齿钉耙，在那里出恭。
孙悟空见了喝道：“你不回话，却蹲在那里干嘛？”
猪八戒道：“大师兄啊！俺老猪吓出屎来了！如今也不消说，赶早儿各自顾命去吧！”
孙悟空道：“这个呆根！我问信偏不惊恐，你去问就这等慌张失智！”
刘晨笑道：“到底如何？”
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