第九百八十五章 衙门轶事
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要说这位书启师爷,虽然长得像个无常二爷,瘦得像根刚问世的火柴棍,整个人其貌不扬,可绝对不能小看他,据说家里乃几辈子专门治人的幕僚世家,他又是县太爷的同乡,还有些沾亲带故的关系。
这人一肚子的鬼主意,县太爷干的那些乌七八槽的事儿,没有一件不是出自他的点子,总是在县太爷面前夸口“自有办法”。
两年来,谁要是听到他说出这四个字,就知道有人要遭殃了,上元县百姓有两句歌谣唱的他,“师爷一声有办法,平民百姓泪如麻。”
今天见他又说“自有办法”,书吏们都留心看看他又要使出什么法术来,果然师爷不慌不忙的叫来一个录事,要他把去年的旧表格拿出来。
哦!大家伙明白了,原来他是要县衙的“补字圣手”帮忙,这位补字圣手本领很大,公文上写错了字,他只要动动手脚,就能和原来的一模一样了,常年节省下来不少公费。
上个月,县太爷还发挥了补字圣手的绝技,给县里捞了一笔进项。当时上面下达公文,给县里摊了三万两银子的捐,说是要拿去给边远地区修桥修路,不管真假,反正公文上就是这么解释的。
咱们县太爷生财有道,更确切的说是师爷辅佐有方,吩咐咱们的补字圣手一挖一补,把“叁”字改成了“肆”字,如此天衣无缝的令有钱人捐了四万两银子出来,净赚一万。
县太爷交代完毕,与师爷施施然退到后面的签押房喝茶去了,上上下下行动起来,好一通擦拭打扫之后,总算是把衙门收拾的差不多了。
地面上泼水降尘,县太爷和师爷两个人出来检查,看到房间里处处井井有条,窗明几净,干干净净的墙上挂着修补过的表格,一扫一年来昏暗不乐的倒霉样子,似乎变得容光焕发了。
“不错!”县太爷满意的笑了一下,想必徐大人也能够满意吧!又命每一张桌案上摆一个翻开的公文或册子,他自己的大老板桌上也摆了几件,还亲自坐上去试了试勤于公务的姿势。
忽然他站起来对着门口施礼,然后又亲热不猥琐的点点头,还不亢不卑的笑了下,嘴巴动了几下,好像在对人说什么话的样子。
书吏门明白了,这是在一本正经的彩排呢,那样子非常滑稽,忍不住要笑出声来,但是县太爷的目光淡淡扫射,大家伙赶快低下头伏案办公。
这时候总算两位大科长来了,号称县太爷的哼哈二将,其余科长副科长的地位低了他俩足足一头。
一个是县太爷的小舅子,据说在私塾混过几天,为了追随姐夫上任,特意把他送到了讲武堂官员的进修班深造了一下,两个月毕业,可算能背得出一些基本的官场八股和新名词了,比如革新,比如科技。
人一来就坐上了吏房的典吏位置,此人别的不行,打牌却异常高明,几乎十赌九赢,大家伙都说他偷牌换牌的手法厉害,常常是几天几夜不下赌局,根本不来衙门。
今儿个不知道从谁家的牌桌上把他请了回来,一进门对县太爷爱理不理的点了点头,就胡乱坐到了县太爷的宝座上了,还不住用手捂着嘴打哈欠。
突然小舅子抡起了砚台“砰”的一声拍在了桌子上,大叫道:“胡了!”
哦嗬!敢情他老人家还迷迷糊糊以为坐在牌桌上呢,书吏门都吃惊的看着他,谁也不敢笑。而县太爷则出于种种的难言之隐,对自己的小舅子无可奈何,只是微微叹息摇头。
这时师爷走过去轻轻说了几句话,小舅子科长方才知趣的站起来,找到自己的位置,可算是忠于职守了。
另外一个户房科长是管钱粮赋税的,此人与县太爷的关系大家一直弄不清楚,听口音也不是县太爷的同乡,看交情也不是县太爷的同窗,成天大模大样的。
大家猜测他或许是县太爷在朝廷的靠山送来的人情,这个人好色如命,有时间就会和妓女鬼混,不知今天县太爷派去的人说了多少好话,才把他从温柔乡里请了回来。
人家进门也是不知道东南西北,睁着两个黑眼圈,一个劲的打哈欠,还是师爷给他当向导,他才走上了自己的岗位。
县太爷没法说什么,大概是后悔自己的决定,又和师爷退到签押房去了,等候着徐大人的到来。
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