ISSUE 12 靠近二垒中
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“该喂二宝了。”
他倏然冻住，我凑过去强调：“它早饭没吃饱，这会儿一定很饿、很饿。”
黑眸里嗖嗖射出冰刀子，“余雅雅。”
破天荒第一次听他叫我名字，我不由得虎躯一震，“有！”
他把菜刀杵到我跟前，磨着后牙槽说：“适可而止。”
菜刀上还粘着肉屑，我吞口口水，小心翼翼用两根手指拎住刀头，“知道了，我知道了，别冲动，冲动是魔鬼。”
他讳莫如深的凝视我，我一阵口干舌燥，耳根子首先滚烫，咬咬唇，决定息事宁人，“那个……你是客，不好劳烦你，午饭还是交给我做……”
他霍地把菜刀往案板上一搁，两只手一左一右撑着流理台，困住我，垂头，呼吸顿然交错。我条件反射要蹦起来，奈何敌强我弱，蹦了也是蹦到他怀里，等同投怀送抱。
“怎……怎么了？你……有什么事儿？”
他自然不答，径自降低高度，我眼睁睁的看着他一一靠近，心慌意乱的想，他……该不会要亲我吧？！现在……？！厨房里……？！
太不浪漫了。
谁知就在他几乎碰到我时，脑袋一偏，贴着我的耳朵低道：“有时候别想太多，损人不利己。”
什么？什么意思？
我恍恍惚惚，他已直起身，若无其事的站回案前，重持菜刀安静切肉，而嘴角却噙着叵测的诡笑，不时瞄瞄傻愣愣的我，可怜我貌似唱独角戏的小丑，他只负责撩拨，然后看戏。
午饭大部分是匡恒做的，我从他跟我说完那句没头没尾的话后，整个脑子如一团稀泥，怎么想都想不透想不清。还让我别想太多，让他这么一弄我能不想太多吗？
小蓝和英伟不明白我们之间发生了什么，感觉餐桌上的气氛说凝重嘛又过分了，说诡谲嘛又不至于，起码冰山大爷看起来轻松惬意，胃口大开，反观我则食如嚼蜡，眼神飘忽，于是两人干脆埋头扒饭。
填饱肚子，小蓝拉着英伟自告奋勇去刷碗，小两口并肩站立，默契的一个洗完一个擦干，时而轻声细语，时而嘻嘻浅笑，你侬我侬的好不甜蜜，单调的厨房冒出一串串粉色泡泡。
我开门到阳台喂二宝，捧着脸羡慕的瞧他们，同样的地，别人是享受，我是煎熬，这样的落差直叫我憋屈。
我怎么就摊上一座冰山了呢？
二宝饱餐一顿，照例扭着小腰窜到我脚边撒娇，狗嘴拱着我的手，问我要饭后心，我感叹道：“二宝呀，你怎么这么馋？我快被你吃穷了。”
二宝摇着短短的尾巴，湿漉漉黑幽幽的眼里透着超无辜的神情，人家被关了一上午，好歹给奖励嘛。
我笑着拉扯它两边的胡子，“好吃鬼，你等一下，我去拿肉干。”
看出我的妥协，二宝兴奋的原地乱蹦，我起身回头，匡恒就站在玻璃门外，他冷睇着二宝，脸上挂着像是要“杀狗灭口”的表情。
我示意他退后，拦着二宝小心的开门进来，我问他：“怎么了？”
“你会不会太溺爱它了？喂那么多，我怕它会肥死。”
我蹙眉，“你又没养过狗，你怎么知道我这样喂会害二宝肥死？狗粮都是定时定量喂的，零嘴选择肉干是因为肉脂肪低，不会导致二宝患上血压高、心脏病，你懂不懂啊？”
匡恒听完也蹙眉，嘴角抿直，与我大眼瞪小眼。我承认我为了刚才厨房的事儿有迁怒，那么他呢？无故指责我是为那般？
小蓝闻声急急忙忙奔过来，见我们剑拔弩张的互不相让，赶紧打圆场，“哎哟，你们也太搞笑了吧，跟小屁孩儿似的，大人一不在就斗嘴。”
英伟怯怯的冒出个脑袋，傻乎乎的说：“我们一起下飞行棋吧。”
在场的其他三人齐刷刷瞪他，他投降，“当我什么没说。”
匡恒别开眼，“你们玩，我有事，先走了。”
小蓝讶然，她马上向我抛出一记“稍安勿躁”的眼神，扯扯我的衣袖，对匡恒说：“那让雅雅送送你。”
“不必！”
“不必！”
我和匡恒异口同声。
话落，我们又各自顿了顿，没看对方，最后他拿起外套，出门。
小蓝不扯衣袖了，改掐我一把，我吃痛，低声质问：“干嘛掐我？”
她跺脚，“败给你了，有你这么别扭的人吗？”
我不服气，指着被某人摔回来的大门说：“你怎么不说他莫名其妙？”
小蓝郁结，“大小姐，恒哥难得主动跟你搭话，你却光顾着蛋里挑骨头，这样你们要怎么相处下去啊？”
“他哪里是跟我搭话？他明明是在骂我。”
小蓝彻底放弃沟通，她摇着头说：“两个人的情商都那么低，往后有得麻烦咯。”
“情商低的是他，别把我拉下水。”
小蓝招手把英伟叫来，她抱着英伟的手臂，学着英伟的腔调，“当我什么没说。”
如此，冰山大爷的“二进宫”以不欢而散告终。
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