第45节:丈母娘(45)
最新网址:m.ltxsdz.com
”你不是结婚的料,那你早说呀!都结了七八年了,老婆把你养得你红光满面,事业发达了,你突然不是结婚的料了?怎么?基因突变了?人家绢子对你可是一心一意,把最好的青春年华都给了你了,你还有什么可说的?现在人过三十了,你要撇下人家,中途下车。龙腾小说ltxsba.com你又不是不知道,再优秀的女人,离婚之后也至少要打五折甚至一折处理!”说着说着我自己都快被我的慷慨陈词感动了,话一出口我才发现,这几年在三个女人的夹缝中苟且生存,练得我越来越能理解体谅女同志的艰难和不易了,瞧我这善解人意的水平,到妇联当个主任都不差。
谁知道大宝居然不以为然地微微一笑:”大哥,这都什么年代了,你也该解放解放思想了,如今的男人,讲究一个有证的,两个固定的,三个n次性的。男人就好比是一辆汽车,女人就好像轮胎,没有女人男人就失去意义,没有轮胎汽车就是摆设。汽车光四个轮子还不够,还要有备胎才行。最少要有一个备胎,一个还不够,2-3个正好。当汽车有一个轮胎爆了,可以随时更换。”
我一听他那歪得不能再歪的歪理,气就不打一处来:”这就是强盗逻辑,混蛋论调!”
大宝嘿嘿一笑:”我是无赖,混蛋已经out了。”我气得张了张嘴,还真不知道该如何下嘴了。我不知道为什么我认识的二十多岁的男孩儿总被别人伤害,可到了三十多岁却总是伤害别人。
这时候,滨子也跑过来了,说人都散了,绢子回去结完帐就回娘家了。他上下一打量,知道我已经黔驴技穷了。就拍着大宝的肩膀,象慰问阶级兄弟一样:”-人不风流枉中年-,兄弟,哥哥理解你。不过,地球人都知道,这真正会玩儿的都是-家里红旗不倒,外面彩旗飘飘-你不能一有外遇就离婚呀,那你泡妞泡成了老公,不是换汤不换药嘛!一定要先保证大后方稳定,不能拣了芝麻丢了西瓜。天涯何处无芳草,何必抓住一个泡。只要用心找一找,肯定还有比她好。”
我一听,他又满嘴跑火车没个正经的,忙示意他快闭嘴。
他一把拉过我:”你快回去搂着孩子洗洗睡去吧,局面都已经失控了,他就交给我了,我能拉他一把就拉一把,不能拉,就让这小子自生自灭,自作自受吧!”
我临走时叮嘱他:”不要轻言放弃呀!宁拆十座庙,不拆一桩婚。一定要尽力挽救失足同志!让他往我这新好男人的队伍里靠拢啊!”
”用词不当啊——男人的外遇叫失手,女人的外遇才叫失足!甭废话,快回去伺候你家老少三代姑奶奶吧!小心回去晚了,再交代不清,连键盘都没得跪,直接拆了主机让你跪主板!”
(27)
我到家的时候丈母娘早把孩子哄睡了,她和我老婆正在聚精会神地抱着电视看一个老和尚讲经,最近这母女俩不知道被谁忽悠得神神叨叨地总是看这种希奇古怪的光盘,上周刚看完一套《山西小院》,这周就升级到念经了。老婆先摁了暂停不满地问:”这么晚才回来,还扫眉搭耷眼的,你不是挺喜欢吃吃喝喝加唱歌的吗?”
我一脸苦笑:”谁唱歌了?跟河边站了半天,净看人家两口子表演-行为艺术-了!你说的真是没错,-要是过得好早跟家偷着乐去了-,还用得着到外面显摆?人家绢子原本一片苦心为了挽救婚姻,结果大宝是泥足深陷,拉都拉不出来了。”我原原本本把晚上的见闻说给她们听,我老婆惊得嘴越张越大,看样子吃惊不小。
”连他俩都要离婚了?看来这世上真没什么可以让人相信的了。绢子真可怜,那么喜欢孩子,结果就因为大宝不想承担责任,做了三次人流,到头来竟还是这种结果!看来见异思迁就是你们男人的特点,一个个打着热爱自由的旗号,其实-贱-才是你们的dna!”老婆怀着悲愤的心情把所有男人一竿子全打趴下了。
一向疾恶如仇的丈母娘更是急不可耐地站出来打抱不平:”这种男人太混蛋了,打都打轻了,我要是绢子她妈,一定上门教训他,好好揍他一顿都不解气。”
[记住网址龙腾小说ltxsba.com]
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