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第四十九章 你个银样镴枪头

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“啥?”

胖子差点一头栽进洗脚水里淹死。龙腾小说ltxsba.com

今晚的剧本到底出了什么问题啊?哥还准备了一整套的说辞呢,一定要尖酸刻薄,一定要残酷冷漠,一定要毫不留情,像秋风扫落叶一般的寒冷——叫你说话不算数p你和小人并列!

满意

郎苑居然说满意?我问的是对“我们的新房”是否满意啊}为什么说满意,她凭什么说满意——她,她,她这是几个意思?

作为藏马山杰出青少年的,年仅十九岁半的,进城尚不足一月的胖子,是真的不会了,大大的露怯了,良久才讪讪地,磕磕绊绊地,提出了一个被人嘲讽了很多年的建议。

因为该建议实属王顾左右而言他,亦可判定为临阵弃枪脱逃——胖子辩称枪没弃,但未被采信,反倒是增加了一条醉死不认那壶酒钱——残忍地暴露了胖子的被其威猛外表掩饰得很好的虚弱本质,俗称银样镴枪头。

该建议也是胖子的彪悍人生中的,为数不多的几个污点之一,如果不是最大的一个。

“要不,我们先——吃面?”

建议如是。

建议被接受。

郎苑微不可察地点了点头,接过面碗来,翻开纸盖,用塑料小叉子慢慢地搅动。

没承想,在该建议付诸实践的过程中,又残忍地暴露了胖子泡妞经验严重不足的问题。

要不说情侣约会呢,就没有吃面的。本娱到浓时,两人各分出一只手来,十指交叉互握。另一只手则你喂我一口,我喂你一口,那滋味美得不要不要的,也就仅次于清嘴吧嗯,你拿塑料小叉子喂对方一口泡面试试?

自个儿吃自个的也不行啊!本应你侬我侬的,来个深情对视,嫣然一笑什么的。这可倒好了,你哧溜一口,我哧溜一口,啥情调都哧溜没了。

一开始两人还各怀心思,有一口没一口地吃呢,不一会儿就哧溜上了,吃得相当豪迈。

泡面这种东西,吃得械,太汹,根本就吃不到嘴里去。你若见到汹吃泡面的异端,最好一棒子打死了账,大家誓。至少也得连汤带面的扣他头上去。

也不知道是谁先哧溜的,胖子说是郎苑,郎苑说是胖子——反正谁还不了解谁啊,谁先哧溜还不是都哧溜?

再说了,从午饭后一直折腾到晚上九点多,两人都已经饿得肚皮贴着脊梁骨了。

结果呢,肚子饱了,画风变了

哧溜进行中,郎苑突然“噗嗤”一声笑了,继而笑得前仰后合的,显然天底下再没有比这更好笑的事情了。

胖子翻着白眼哧溜了一口——傻妞吃到了一个“再来一碗”?这样笑很没家教哎!

郎苑终于笑饱了,探过来一张特别欠揍的脸,就像发现了新大陆一样的兴奋,“嘻嘻,你是初哥吧?”

胖子从嘴角抽到后脑勺,嘴里的泡面簌簌地往地上落。好讨厌,干嘛问人家这种问题

其实,郎苑几乎是下意识地说出“满意”两个字时,心里也是紧张得不行,也是不知道怎么往下翻页了。

但谁让胖子先露怯了呢?

哧溜了将近两碗泡面之后,郎苑就有点纳闷了——刚才我怎么就巷糊涂地“满意”了呢?

貌似还觉得胖子有化腐朽为神奇之功效,效率极高,效果立见,硬是把一个阴冷埋汰的破房间变成了一个温暖安逸的小窝。他真的做到了p胖子,没问题;要跟胖子在一起,就什么都不用操心i苑甚至想到了斜候被爸爸领着去游乐园

莫不是冻得失去理智了,饿得没有节操了?还是老庄孙子说得好,重大事项一定要在吃饱喝得之后再做决定!

对新房是否满意,显然属于重大事项,不可不察也。

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